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Agree or disagree with the following statement: Standardized tests like the TOEFL provide sufficient information to determine whether students should be admitted to a college or university. v.1

Agree or disagree with the following statement: Standardized tests like the TOEFL provide sufficient information to determine whether students should be admitted to a college or university. v. 1
There is no doubt that women nowadays are playing an increasingly significant role in our society, in particular by taking up employment in sectors which were mainly male dominated. While some are of the opinion that women are not suited for police or military forces, I would agree with those who agree that they should be given an equal chance. Many believe that women cannot be employed in the defence force. This is because arguably, females do not have the strength and stamina required for such a strenuous job. For instance, in sports competitions, the difference in physical strength of man and woman is obvious. Some men can run faster and are stronger than their female counterparts. Consequently, people with this view think that a woman`s place is better at doing stereotypical work such as being a teacher or a carer. However, I believe that women should be given the opportunity to participate in the police or military forces. The reason for this is that women possess other attributes that can be of benefit to those sectors. For instance, a woman is likely to be more inclined to being nurturing and caring; such traits are ideal for female medics in the army. Moreover, a female presence is more appropriate in certain circumstances. A fitting example is that in Mauritius, a policewoman needs to be present whenever a girl or lady is taking her driving test. Thus, this builds more trust and imparts a sense of security to the test taker. In my opinion, both arguments have their merits. On balance, however, I tend to believe that women should be able to participate equally in defence forces as they have other traits and qualities that men do not possess.
There is no doubt that
women
nowadays are playing an
increasingly
significant role in our society,
in particular
by taking up employment in sectors which were
mainly
male dominated. While
some
are of the opinion that
women
are not suited for police or military
forces
, I would
agree
with those who
agree
that they should be
given
an equal chance.

Many
believe that
women
cannot
be employed
in the
defence
force
. This is
because
arguably
,
females
do not have the strength and stamina required for such a strenuous job.
For instance
, in sports competitions, the difference in physical strength of
man
and woman is obvious.
Some
men
can run faster and are stronger than their
female
counterparts.
Consequently
,
people
with this view
think
that a
woman`s
place is better at doing stereotypical work such as being a teacher or a carer.

However
, I believe that
women
should be
given
the opportunity to participate in the police or military
forces
.
The reason for this is
that
women
possess other attributes that can be of benefit to those sectors.
For instance
, a woman is likely to be more inclined to being nurturing and caring; such traits are ideal for
female
medics in the army.
Moreover
, a
female
presence is more appropriate in certain circumstances. A fitting example is that in Mauritius, a policewoman needs to be present whenever a girl or lady is taking her driving
test
.
Thus
, this builds more trust and imparts a sense of security to the
test
taker.

In my opinion, both arguments have their merits. On balance,
however
, I tend to believe that
women
should be able to participate
equally
in
defence
forces
as they have other traits and qualities that
men
do not possess.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Agree or disagree with the following statement: Standardized tests like the TOEFL provide sufficient information to determine whether students should be admitted to a college or university. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
288 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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