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A SAMPLEYou should spend about 40 miniutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views a v.1

A SAMPLEYou should spend about 40 miniutes on this task. : Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. 1
In the past, clothes were being worn by people as a symbol of their culture, which has changed a lot over the decades. Due to globalization, people are tending to accept those clothes which are commonly worn throughout the world. I believe, this has much more good effect which outweighs the drawback quite easily. It is undeniably true that there are some drawbacks to this tendency because it may lead to disappearing of the uniqueness of a nation. Traditional clothes always represent the heritage, beliefs, tradition and roots of a nation or race or entire country. While people are obsessed with the global brand, they have less interest in their cultural heritage. As a result, a country may face the extinction of their own tradition permanently. However, I believe that there are more positive sides than negative in order to prefer similar clothes. Firstly, It has an important role to eradicate discrimination to other people culture or tradition. Such As, if all people wear the same clothes, no one can make fun of clothes. For instance, In Africa, there are many tribes who wear traditional dresses which are quite different than the modern world. By wearing those clothes, if they decide to come to any international events, some people will eventually make trolls of them. Secondly, these clothes are less expensive, which makes it affordable to all levels of people. Furthermore, this tendency is economically profitable for 3rd world countries. For instance, Bangladesh, Srilanka and India have plenty of ready-made garment industry, from where companies like H&M, Zara collect shirts, Jeans pants to fulfil the growing demands of these cloths. Hence, people from these countries are getting a job and become financially stable, which resulting in economic development for the entire country. In Conclusion, Replacing traditional clothes with global common dresses may have some consequences, but to adopt the modern era, there are no questions about the role of wearing similar clothes.
In the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
were
being worn
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as a symbol of their culture, which has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
a lot over the decades. Due to globalization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are tending to accept those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
which are
commonly
worn throughout the world. I believe, this has much more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
effect which outweighs the drawback quite
easily
.

It is
undeniably
true that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks to this tendency
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it may lead to disappearing of the uniqueness of a nation. Traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
always represent the heritage, beliefs, tradition and roots of a nation or race or entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are obsessed
with the global brand, they have less interest in their cultural heritage.
As a result
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
may face the extinction of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
tradition
permanently
.

However
, I believe that there are more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
in order to prefer similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
.
Firstly
, It has an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role to eradicate discrimination to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
culture or tradition. Such As, if all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
wear the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, no one can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
fun of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
.
For instance
, In Africa, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tribes who wear traditional dresses which are quite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Did you mean 'different "from"? 'Different than' is often considered colloquial style.
than
the modern world. By wearing those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, if they decide to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to any international
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
trolls of them.
Secondly
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
are less expensive, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it affordable to all levels of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Furthermore
, this tendency is
economically
profitable for 3rd world
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
For instance
, Bangladesh,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Srilanka
and India have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of ready-made garment industry, from where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
like H&M, Zara collect shirts, Jeans pants to fulfil the growing demands of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cloths
.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are getting a job and become
financially
stable, which resulting in economic development for the entire country.

In Conclusion
, Replacing traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
with global common dresses may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
consequences,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
to adopt the modern era, there are no questions about the role of wearing similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay A SAMPLEYou should spend about 40 miniutes on this task. : Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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