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A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.2

A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. with this opinion? v. 2
Nowadays, more and more people prefer to use mobiles, some consider this as a negative development; others think that it has many benefits as well. In my opinion, I consider, using mobile phones can bring more advantages than any bad influence it might cause. On the one hand, those who believe that, mobile phones are evil, point out that, this can tarnish both family relationships and friendships. This is because nowadays, people’s screen time has increasing; mobile phone users prefer to communicate with online friends rather than real life relationships. This, even causes problems in their workplace as well, due to lack of concentration, they may not be able to complete their assignments on time. Apart from this, because of the veil of anonymity, conversations in the chat rooms and discussion platform often offensive. Finally, sometimes this can be used to spread false information and propaganda to tarnish someone's life purposefully. However, opponents of the above argument think that this abolishes the distances an I firmly support this. This facilitates people to interact with friends and relatives, who, even, live in the other part of the globe. Customers of mobile phones can access to the internet, where they can join multiple social media communities according to their interest. This also allows them to have constructive conversations with like -minded people. Many people regain their long -lost -friendships through this medium. Finally, this can use to protect various outrageous political actions and also get international attentions this sometimes influences political decisions.
Nowadays, more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
mobiles,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
consider this as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development; others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits
as well
. In my opinion, I consider, using mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
can bring more advantages than any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influence it might cause.

On the one hand, those who believe that, mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
are evil, point out that, this can tarnish both family relationships and friendships. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
screen time has increasing; mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
users prefer to communicate with online friends
rather
than real life relationships. This, even causes problems in their workplace
as well
, due to lack of concentration, they may not be able to complete their assignments on time. Apart from this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the veil of anonymity, conversations in the chat rooms and discussion platform
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
offensive.
Finally
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
this can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to spread false information and propaganda to tarnish someone's life
purposefully
.

However
, opponents of the above argument
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this abolishes the distances
Possible typo. Did you mean "an" or "I"?
an I
firmly
support this. This facilitates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to interact with friends and relatives, who, even,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the other part of the globe. Customers of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
can access to the internet, where they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
multiple social media communities according to their interest. This
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to have constructive conversations with like -minded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
regain their long -lost -friendships through this medium.
Finally
, this can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
to protect various outrageous political actions and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
international attentions this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
influences political decisions.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. with this opinion? v. 2

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
250 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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