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A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweigh its drawbacks? v.14

A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweigh its drawbacks? v. 14
Tourism is deemed a prominent component contributing to not only private income, but also government’s revenue in many countries in this era; however, this industry presents a large number of drawbacks when it is not managed properly. From my point of view, despite the downsides, advantages which tourism brings are more considerable. On the one hand, touristry maintains two disadvantages in terms of preserving heritages along with protecting the local environment. With respect to preservation, there is likelihood that historic heritages are prone to damage when more tourists come to these destinations. This ruin might trace its roots from the poor sense of responsibility of visitors as well as the dearth of prevailing laws to protect these sites of governments. Besides, an increasing number of visitors spells a trouble that the environment in local places will be put under great pressure since these people could emit a great deal of gadget. Many fishes in NhaTrang, a prominent beach in Vietnam, for instance, died when they were caught in bottles of tourists in 2008. On the other hand, I believe that such industry offers a variety of benefits which might outweigh the drawbacks mentioned. Firstly, travel could boost national economy sustainable because this activity does not require fossil fuel. This also means that the economy will be more stable as the authorities do not need to think of material supply. Moreover, this kind of industry offers local residents new jobs such as tour guides, hotels, restaurants, which are profitable. As a result, the income of these people will be improved and they have the opportunity to attain a higher living standard. In conclusion, I suppose that tourism has its own pros and cons; however, the advantages brought are somewhat predominant over the disadvantages
Tourism
is deemed
a prominent component contributing to not
only
private income,
but
also
government
’s revenue in
many
countries in this era;
however
, this industry presents
a large number of
drawbacks when it is not managed
properly
. From my point of view, despite the downsides, advantages which tourism brings are more considerable.

On the one hand,
touristry
maintains two disadvantages in terms of preserving heritages along with protecting the local environment. With respect to preservation, there is likelihood that historic heritages are prone to damage when more tourists
come
to these destinations. This ruin might trace its roots from the poor sense of responsibility of visitors
as well
as the dearth of prevailing laws to protect these sites of
governments
.
Besides
, an increasing number of visitors spells a trouble that the environment in local places will
be put
under great pressure since these
people
could emit a great deal of gadget.
Many
fishes in
NhaTrang
, a prominent beach in Vietnam,
for instance
,
died
when they
were caught
in bottles of tourists in 2008.

On the other hand
, I believe that such industry offers a variety of benefits which might outweigh the drawbacks mentioned.
Firstly
, travel could boost national economy sustainable
because
this activity does not require fossil fuel. This
also
means that the economy will be more stable as the authorities do not need to
think
of material supply.
Moreover
, this kind of industry offers local residents new jobs such as tour guides, hotels, restaurants, which are profitable.
As a result
, the income of these
people
will be
improved and
they have the opportunity to attain a higher living standard.

In conclusion
, I suppose that tourism has its
own
pros and cons;
however
, the advantages brought are somewhat predominant over the disadvantages
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
A man who knows two languages is worth two men.
French Proverb

IELTS essay A lot of places in the world rely on tourism as a main source of income. Unfortunately, tourism can also be a source of problems if it is not managed correctly. Describe the advantages and disadvantages of tourism in the modern world. Do you think that benefits of tourism outweigh its drawbacks? v. 14

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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