Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

A group of people believe that smoking in the public should be banned. Other groups of people argue that it should not. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.1

A group of people believe that smoking in the public should be banned. Other groups of people argue that it should not. v. 1
It is no doubt that most, if not all, people would encounter obstacles and challenges throughout their life. A group of people believe that admitting obstacles is the best solution to cope with a disadvantaged situation. Whilst, other groups of people support the idea that it is better to improve such bad circumstances. This essay is going to compare the two opinions and furthermore to state my personal view. Indeed, it is not uncommon to see people facing a difficult time at some time. Although accepting oneself encountering poor situation might seem to be discouraging, but it might also be a terrific opportunity for people to take a step backwards, and to identify the reasons behind such circumstances. As people might not be able to notice the mistakes they could be making when they are standing at the tip of a cliff. For basketball, players usually get frustrated when they are losing points, subsequently, they would lose even more. What a coach usually do by that time could be calling for a time out. In order to let players to calm themselves down, and most importantly, to let them realize the mistakes they were making during the game. This could work the same when we are dealing with difficulties in our life. Only if they realize the mistakes they have made, can they avoid the same tragedy from happening. In spite of the fact that admitting a hard time could be a good way to cope with difficulties, however, trying to improve such a situation could also be an alternative way. Obviously, no one would like to accept failure and willingly to start all over again. Seeking a solution to solve the deadlock might also be a good way to cope with a poor situation. For every problem, there is always a solution, and it is a matter of fact that in what time could we know it. A report had shown that people who do not easily give up on trying, are usually those who grant great success in their own field. To sum up, accepting a poor situation would be a great chance for people to realize the reasons behind the difficulties. However, working for a solution to improve could also be a motivating option. Personally, I do not see the two views are mutually exclusive. Only through integrating the two, can we find the best solution to cope with a bad situation.
It is no doubt that most, if not all,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would encounter obstacles and challenges throughout their life. A group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that admitting obstacles is the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cope
with a disadvantaged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
. Whilst, other groups of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that it is better to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
circumstances. This essay is going to compare the two opinions and
furthermore
to state my personal view.

Indeed
, it is not uncommon to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
facing a difficult
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Although accepting oneself encountering poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
seem to be discouraging,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
also
be a terrific opportunity for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to take a step backwards, and to identify the reasons behind such circumstances. As
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not be able to notice the mistakes they could be making when they are standing at the tip of a cliff. For basketball, players
usually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
frustrated when they are losing points,
subsequently
, they would lose even more. What a coach
usually
do by that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
could be calling for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
out. In order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
players to calm themselves down, and most
importantly
, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
them realize the mistakes they were making during the game. This could work the same when we are dealing with difficulties in our life.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
if they realize the mistakes they have made, can they avoid the same tragedy from happening.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
the fact that admitting a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
could be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cope
with difficulties,
however
, trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
such a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
could
also
be an alternative way.
Obviously
, no one would like to accept failure and
willingly
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
all over again. Seeking a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
to solve the deadlock
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
also
be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cope
with a poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
. For every problem, there is always a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
, and it is a matter of fact that in what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
could we know it. A report had shown that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do not
easily
give up on trying, are
usually
those who grant great success in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
field.

To sum up, accepting a poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
would be a great chance for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to realize the reasons behind the difficulties.
However
, working for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
could
also
be a motivating option.
Personally
, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the two views are
mutually
exclusive.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
through integrating the two, can we find the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
solution
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cope
with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
It is astonishing how much enjoyment one can get out of a language that one understands imperfectly.
Basil Lanneau Gildersleeve

IELTS essay A group of people believe that smoking in the public should be banned. Other groups of people argue that it should not. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
405 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts