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A government's role is only to provide defence capability and urban infrastructure, such as roads, water and power. All other services, such as education, health and social security, should be provided by private groups or individuals in the community. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.3

A government's role is only to provide defence capability and urban infrastructure, such as roads, water and power. All other services, such as education, health and social security, should be provided by private groups or individuals in the community. v. 3
The role of government has become a debatable issue. Some natives believe that the ministry should only provide services related to defence, infrastructure and electricity. However, other services should be given by other private companies. I think authority and private firms should joint their hands together for the development of the nation. This essay will discuss the reasons behind such need with some feasible conclusion. To begin with, The revenue of government mainly comprises tax money so it is quite difficult for the authority to allocate funds on all sectors with the need of the natives. I think power should allocate money on defence and infrastructure because both sectors are vital for the security and development of the country. If ministry spent money on defence, then they would be able to protect the country from enemies like terrorist attack, war etc. At the same time, funding in infrastructure helps to raise the economy and also promote international business. Therefore, some private companies should come forward to provide services to the community. Moreover, these firms help to upgrade the nations with new technology and bring advancement in all sectors. For example, there are many private institutions and hospitals in India which serve the public with the latest development like smart classes and new technology to curb major diseases like cancer, heart attack etc. Hence, this will not only enhance the economic growth, but also helps to curb major concerns of the nations like unemployment, health issues, poverty and so on. In conclusion, no doubt authority is obliged to serve the country through services. It is also suggested that private companies and society as a whole come forward for the well being of the nation.
The role of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
has become a debatable issue.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
natives believe that the ministry should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
related to
Possible spelling mistake. 'defence' is British English.
defence
, infrastructure and electricity.
However
, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
authority and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
firms should joint their hands together for the development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. This essay will discuss the reasons behind such need with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
feasible conclusion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, The revenue of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
mainly
comprises tax money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is quite difficult for the authority to allocate funds on all sectors with the need of the natives. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
power should allocate money on
Possible spelling mistake. 'defence' is British English.
defence
and infrastructure
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
both sectors are vital for the security and development of the country. If ministry spent money on
Possible spelling mistake. 'defence' is British English.
defence
, then they would be able to protect the country from enemies like terrorist attack, war etc. At the same time, funding in infrastructure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to raise the economy and
also
promote international business.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
to the community.

Moreover
, these firms
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to upgrade the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
with new technology and bring advancement in all sectors.
For example
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
institutions and hospitals in India which serve the public with the latest development like smart classes and new technology to curb major diseases like cancer, heart attack etc.
Hence
, this will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
enhance the economic growth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
to curb major concerns of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
like unemployment, health issues, poverty and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.

In conclusion
, no doubt authority
is obliged
to serve the country through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
. It is
also
suggested that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and society as a whole
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
forward for the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well being
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay A government's role is only to provide defence capability and urban infrastructure, such as roads, water and power. All other services, such as education, health and social security, should be provided by private groups or individuals in the community. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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