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A company has announced that it wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position v.2

A company has announced that it wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position v. 2
People have argued about the proposal of building a plant near the residential area. Some people think that it will bring many benefits for the local society, while others believe that it will have a negative effect on the surroundings. The following essay will discuss in details about the advantages and disadvantages of it. On the one hand, it is true that building a new business unit near the local residential zone will bring a lot of benefits for many parties. Firstly, it will generate a lot of job opportunities for the local people. It is common that a factory will absorb many employments, and for efficiency, it will give priority in hiring the local people. Secondly, the scenario will boost the economic development of its' locality. Many investors will build mini market, gas station or restaurant as many of the cooperative workers will seek these commercial places. As a result, it will positively affect the real estate business of the surrounding area as well. On the other hand, it is undeniable that the plan could also bring negative effects to the society and to the climate. It is a fact that many factories are generating wastes and they could create harmful effects to the local ambiance. For example, the waste water from the manufactory might be directly flown into the local river and contaminated the surrounding environment. And then, the factory might also generate some smokes, which might be a treat for the local people. These people might have some serious respiration problems due to inhaling the polluted air. Therefore, there should be a clear regulation and strict monitoring over it in the future. In conclusion, it is a fact that the aim of building a commercial enterprise near a residential spot will create some pros and cons. In my opinion, I do believe that the positive sides of the way outweigh the negatives, as long as the plan follows the government regulation and it is clearly monitored by the authority.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have argued about the proposal of building a plant near the residential area.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it will bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
society, while others believe that it will have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on the surroundings. The following essay will discuss in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
about the advantages and disadvantages of it.

On the one hand, it is true that building a new business unit near the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
residential zone will bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
benefits for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parties.
Firstly
, it will generate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
job opportunities for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. It is common that a factory will absorb
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
employments, and for efficiency, it will give priority in hiring the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Secondly
, the scenario will boost the economic development of
An apostrophe is never used to form possessive case pronouns. Did you mean: "its"?
its'
locality.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
investors will build mini market, gas station or restaurant as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the cooperative workers will seek these commercial places.
As a result
, it will
positively
affect the real estate business of the surrounding area
as well
.

On the other hand
, it is undeniable that the plan could
also
bring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects to the society and to the climate. It is a fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factories are generating
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
wastes and
they could create harmful effects to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
ambiance.
For example
, the waste water from the
Possible spelling mistake found.
manufactory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be
directly
flown into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
river and contaminated the surrounding environment. And then, the factory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
also
generate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
smokes, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
be a treat for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
serious respiration problems due to inhaling the polluted air.
Therefore
, there should be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
regulation and strict monitoring over it in the future.

In conclusion
, it is a fact that the aim of building a commercial enterprise near a residential spot will create
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
pros and cons. In my opinion, I do believe that the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
sides of the way outweigh the negatives, as long as the plan follows the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
regulation and it is
clearly
monitored by the authority.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay A company has announced that it wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
332 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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