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6. Most adults believe that modern children (5-10 years old) behave worse than those in the past. What action parents should take do you think will have the most positive effect on children to help them behave better like respecting and treating others kin v.2

6. Most adults believe that modern children (5-10 years old) behave worse than those in the past. What action parents should take do you think will have the most positive effect on children to help them behave better like respecting and treating others kin v. 2
We have to admit that all the three methods offered by the material are to some degree effective on helping children behave better. Yet, from my personal point of view, talking with children more have the best effect, which can be supported by the following aspects. To begin with, more communication encourages children to consciously mind and regularize their behaviors. By talking with kids more, parents guide kids to realize that just like themselves, others also want to be respected and treated kindly and they will feel sad if receiving terrible treatment, too. Therefore, when stay with their peers, kids tend to think about the consequence of their behaviors from others’ angles. In this situation, they will spontaneously avoid bad behaviors and show others their esteem and kindness. Consider about a five-year-old boy, he may sometimes say some terrible words to people, for he just dose not know what feelings that these words can bring to others. Now his father notices this and has some conversations with him. The father asks the boy to try about hearing some bed words. Definitely, the boy gets angry. ‘Bad words will also annoy other people, just like they do to you. ’, Father’s words make the boy realize that he should treat other people with goodness, just like himself wants to be treated with. Hence, the boy finally learn about how to behave well. Besides, having more conversations with kids offers parents more opportunities to teach them good behaviors. Kids are all innocent, they do wrong just because nobody tells them what is right. While talking with children, parents are aware of their thoughts, they can point out what kinds of action is not proper and show them how to behave appropriately. After seeing the samples set by their parents, children will simulate these the next time and finally master how to esteem others as well as treat others kindly. For example, a four-year-old girl likes saying out others weakness loudly. Her original purpose may not be deliberately offend others, she probably believes that this is helping others to improve themselves. Her mother notices this and spends more time having conversation with her. Arguing that directly talking about others drawbacks is impolite, the mother shows the girl how to properly show others their fault with gentle words and help them to correct it. Mother’s right doing makes the girl be aware of her mistakes, so she alters her way to behave better. Of course, limiting kids’ TV programme and monitors them more do have some effects. Yet both of these two methods can only guarantee that children will not gain something bad or do something wrong, but neither of them is able to teach kids what is the right behaviors or lead them learn about how to behave properly. These means, the seconds way is clearly more effective that the others. To summarize, by creating chances for parents to teach children and for children consciously improve their behaviors, talking with children more is obviously the best way from all the three methods.
We
have to
admit that all the three methods offered by the material are to
some
degree effective on helping
children
behave
better.
Yet
, from my personal point of view, talking with
children
more have the best effect, which can
be supported
by the following aspects.

To
begin
with, more communication encourages
children
to
consciously
mind and regularize their
behaviors
. By talking with
kids
more,
parents
guide
kids
to realize that
just
like themselves, others
also
want to
be respected
and treated
kindly and
they will feel sad if receiving terrible treatment, too.
Therefore
, when stay with their peers,
kids
tend to
think
about the consequence of their
behaviors
from others’ angles. In this situation, they will
spontaneously
avoid
bad
behaviors
and
show
others their esteem and kindness.
Consider about a
five-year-
old
boy
, he may
sometimes
say
some
terrible words to
people
, for
he
just
dose
not know what feelings that these words can bring to others.
Now
his father notices this and has
some
conversations with him. The father asks the
boy
to try about hearing
some
bed words. Definitely, the
boy
gets
angry. ‘
Bad
words will
also
annoy
other
people
,
just
like they do to you. ’, Father’s words
make
the
boy
realize that he should treat
other
people
with goodness,
just
like himself wants to
be treated
with.
Hence
, the
boy
finally
learn about how to
behave
well.

Besides
, having more conversations with
kids
offers
parents
more opportunities to teach them
good
behaviors
.
Kids
are all innocent, they do
wrong
just
because
nobody
tells
them what is right. While talking with
children
,
parents
are aware of their thoughts, they can point out what kinds of action is not proper and
show
them how to
behave
appropriately
. After seeing the samples set by their
parents
,
children
will simulate these the
next
time and
finally
master how to esteem others
as well
as treat others kindly.
For example
, a four-year-
old
girl likes saying out others weakness
loudly
. Her original purpose may not be
deliberately
offend
others, she
probably
believes that this is helping others to
improve
themselves. Her mother notices this and spends more time having conversation with her. Arguing that
directly
talking about others drawbacks is impolite, the mother
shows
the girl how to
properly
show
others their fault with gentle words and
help
them to correct it. Mother’s right doing
makes
the girl be aware of her mistakes,
so
she alters her way to
behave
better.

Of course
, limiting
kids’
TV
programme
and monitors them more do have
some
effects.
Yet
both of these two methods can
only
guarantee that
children
will not gain something
bad
or do something
wrong
,
but
neither of them is able to teach
kids
what is the right
behaviors
or lead them learn about how to
behave
properly
. These means, the seconds way is
clearly
more effective that the others.

To summarize
, by creating chances for
parents
to teach
children
and for
children
consciously
improve
their
behaviors
, talking with
children
more is
obviously
the best way from all the three methods.
17Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay 6. Most adults believe that modern children (5-10 years old) behave worse than those in the past. What action parents should take do you think will have the most positive effect on children to help them behave better like respecting and treating others kin v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
509 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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