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63)Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Most experiences in our lives that seemed difficult at the time become valuable lessons for the future. Use reasons and specific examples to support our answer. v.1

63) Most experiences in our lives that seemed difficult at the time become valuable lessons for the future. Use reasons and specific examples to support our answer. v. 1
In the contemporary society, English is arguably the most prevailing language in the world due to the rapid development of tourism industries and globalisation. However, it is commonly believed that the trend could substantially increase the likelihood of English becoming the sole language utilized internationally. The following paragraphs will discuss the merits and demerits of speaking one language in the world. It is reasonable to consider that the majority of people are the beneficiaries of such an eventuality. First of all, having one language in the world could enhance the efficiency in communication. For instance, people are able to comprehend each other quicker in conversations; besides, if an employee works in an overseas company, he/she can effortlessly understand the financial documents of that enterprise. In addition, it is conducive for individuals to expand their social networks, as they do not need to be obsessive about the language barrier in the interaction. On the other hand, despite the benefits people can acquire from using only one language globally, the drawbacks should not be neglected or downplayed. Some people consider the ubiquitous spread of English as the culprit of the loss of cultural diversity. To illustrate, English, as the most prevalent language in the world, merely conveys the values, lifestyles, and traditions of English-speaking countries, which might compromise the beliefs and faith of people from other backgrounds about their own culture. As a consequence, these people will be discouraged from cleaving to their religions and traditions. To conclude with my opinion, using one language in the world will provide us with more conveniences to communicate with each other and contributes to the expansion of their social network. However, it could also extirpate a myriad of other cultures and civilizations.
In the contemporary society, English is
arguably
the most prevailing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
due to the rapid development of tourism industries and
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
.
However
, it is
commonly
believed that the trend could
substantially
increase the likelihood of English becoming the sole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
utilized
internationally
. The following paragraphs will discuss the merits and demerits of speaking one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in the world.

It is reasonable to consider that the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are the beneficiaries of such an eventuality.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, having one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
could enhance the efficiency in communication.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are able to comprehend each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
quicker in conversations;
besides
, if an employee works in an overseas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, he/she can
effortlessly
understand the financial documents of that enterprise.
In addition
, it is conducive for individuals to expand their social networks, as they do not need to be obsessive about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
barrier in the interaction.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, despite the benefits
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can acquire from using
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
globally, the drawbacks should not
be neglected
or downplayed.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider the ubiquitous spread of English as the culprit of the loss of cultural diversity. To illustrate, English, as the most prevalent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
,
merely
conveys the values, lifestyles, and traditions of English-speaking countries, which might compromise the beliefs and faith of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
backgrounds about their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
culture. As a consequence, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
be discouraged
from cleaving to their religions and traditions.

To conclude
with my opinion, using one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
language
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
will provide us with more conveniences to communicate with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
and contributes to the expansion of their social network.
However
, it could
also
extirpate a myriad of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
cultures and civilizations.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay 63) Most experiences in our lives that seemed difficult at the time become valuable lessons for the future. Use reasons and specific examples to support our answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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