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2079 third describe a museumhow often do you visit the museumwhich type of museum is popular in your countrywhy do you want to visit this museum? v.1

2079 third describe a museumhow often do you visit the museumwhich type of museum is popular in your countrywhy do you want to visit this museum? v. 1
People living in urban areas are increasing than before. The population of young people living in rural areas is decrementing which leaves only senior citizens in the countryside. This essay will discuss the problems of this and provide solution for this issue. There are a set of problems arises due to the migration of young people from the rural area. The first is lack of energetic people to support older people. In other words, due to the absence of youth in the families, old people are more likely to suffer, in case of any emergencies. For instance, old age homes in Rural areas are rising day by day and the reason behind this is the unavailability of the children and grandchildren in their family. Due to this, older people prefer to stay in old age homes. The second problem, linked to the first, is the loneliness affecting to elderlies due to the unavailability of their dear ones. For example, as per a survey of the Indian express about old people, the number of people getting admitted to mental hospitals from villages are increasing every day. This is due the absence of their closed ones. Tackling this issue involving bringing more jobs to rural areas. This needs to happen via government and the investors as they are not interested in starting new industries in the countryside. For instance, due to the arrival of a solar power plant in a remote village of Tamilnadu state in India, many young people got employed there and due to this, they are staying in their own place. Bringing more jobs to rural areas can solve this problem to a great extend. In conclusion, due to the increasing tendency of young people migrate to cities, villages are only populated with older generations and problems such as lack of young people in the village and loneliness causing to elderlies. If the government and other authorities are taking actions to bring more job opportunities to the village, this issue can be resolved.
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People
living in urban
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
are increasing than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. The population of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
is decrementing which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leaves
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
senior citizens in the countryside. This essay will discuss the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
of this and provide solution for this issue.

There are a set of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
arises
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the migration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
area.

The
first
is lack of energetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to support older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the absence of youth in the families,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more likely to suffer, in case of any emergencies.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
age homes in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
are rising day by day and the reason behind this is the unavailability of the children and grandchildren in their family.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Due
to this, older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to stay in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
age homes. The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
, linked to the
first
, is the loneliness affecting to
Possible spelling mistake found.
elderlies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the unavailability of their dear ones.
For example
, as per a survey of the Indian express about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
getting admitted to mental hospitals from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
are increasing every day. This is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
the absence of their closed ones.

Tackling this issue involving bringing more jobs to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. This needs to happen via
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and the investors as they are not interested in starting new industries in the countryside.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the arrival of a solar power plant in a remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Tamilnadu
state in India,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
employed there and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to this, they are staying in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
place. Bringing more jobs to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
can solve this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
to a great
Did you mean the noun "extent"?
extend
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the increasing tendency of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
migrate to cities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
villages
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
populated with older generations and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
such as lack of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
and loneliness causing to
Possible spelling mistake found.
elderlies
. If the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and other authorities are taking actions to bring more job opportunities to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
village
, this issue can
be resolved
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language is wine upon the lips. – Virginia WoolfInspirational quotes for language learners
Virginia Woolf

IELTS essay 2079 third describe a museumhow often do you visit the museumwhich type of museum is popular in your countrywhy do you want to visit this museum? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
334 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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