Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

1432 Describe a positive change in your life. You should say: when it happenedwhere it happenedwhat the change wasand explain how you have benefited from this change. v.1

1432 Describe a positive change in your life. You should say: when it happenedwhere it happenedwhat the change wasand explain how you have benefited from this change. v. 1
In this modern world, perspective of how to keep animals are varied between people, some people think about caging them in zoos or forests while others think it is illogical to limit animal's movements. I am going to discuss these views according to environmental, personal and economic perspective. Keeping some animals in zoos will protect them against predators, bad weather, and food availability. Nevertheless, keeping animals is more logical than isolating them because if we keep animals caged, they would not be able to have fresh air and chase other animals. Therefore, it is cruel keeping animals confined in small spaces. It is advisable to put our efforts into keeping our creatures in their natural habitats, in order to get a luggage bag you should call the reception prior to notice. Keeping animals is essential because some animals are becoming extinct. Although keeping these animals is costly, the profits made by these animals are substantial. Take Indian lion for example, a wide range of people travels to India to see these animals in circuses in India. However, some people think that governments should invest money in improving the infrastructure of their nations instead. Building new electrical power station, for instance, is more important than spending thousands of pounds to preserve certain creatures from extinction. Lastly, keeping animals is important to study and research, whereas others think we have no right to use animals for entertainment and in labs. To conclude, keeping animals in zoos might have many values, but it is irrational to keep these animals away from natural habitat. The reasons are besides they are not vulnerable creatures, they have the right to survive independently because of having feelings and emotions as human.
In this modern world, perspective of how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are varied
between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
about caging them in zoos or forests while others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
it is illogical to limit animal's movements. I am going to discuss these views according to environmental, personal and economic perspective.

Keeping
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in zoos will protect them against predators,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
weather, and food availability.
Nevertheless
, keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is more logical than isolating them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
caged, they would not be able to have fresh air and chase other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
Therefore
, it is cruel keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
confined in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
spaces. It is advisable to put our efforts into keeping our creatures in their natural habitats, in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a luggage bag you should call the reception prior to notice.

Keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is essential
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are becoming extinct. Although keeping these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is costly, the profits made by these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are substantial. Take Indian lion
for example
, a wide range of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
travels to India to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in circuses in India.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should invest money in improving the infrastructure of their nations
instead
. Building new electrical power station,
for instance
, is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
than spending thousands of pounds to preserve certain creatures from extinction.

Lastly
, keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to study and research, whereas others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
we have no right to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
for entertainment and in labs.

To conclude
, keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
in zoos might have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
values,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is irrational to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
away from natural habitat. The reasons are
besides
they are not vulnerable creatures, they have the right to survive
independently
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of having feelings and emotions as human.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay 1432 Describe a positive change in your life. You should say: when it happenedwhere it happenedwhat the change wasand explain how you have benefited from this change. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
284 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts