Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

11/10/2017Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries? v.1

11/10/2017Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries? v. 1
Moves produced abroad are often more popular than locally made ones. Below some possible reasons for the trend will be discussed, and whether a government ought to buttress local film industries or not will be considered in details. To begin with, foreign films are popular due to several reasons. Firstly, Hollywood and European movies usually have better quality of picture, more interesting plot, spectacular special effects and star famous actors and actresses. Those features incentivize public to spend their money and time on watching the overseas product. Secondly, a novel and peculiar culture oftentimes is being presented in films shot abroad. In fact, each movie represents new prospect on the reality and the values of the country in which it was produced. Viewers who seek emotions and novel, mind-breaking outlook on life are drawn to the unusual movies created in distant countries. Those are two secrets of the success of foreign films. Furthermore, the overwhelming popularity of overseas cinema, in particular, American one makes sponsoring local movie industries by government structures a worthwhile endeavor. Primarily, this step may stimulate the production of films that will promote national interests, values, traditions and a feeling of patriotism. This investment will likely have an advantageous impact on local culture that is threatened by the spreading Hollywood influence. In addition, allocating money to national companies has a benevolent effect on the quality of movies produced and motivates country’s businesses to pay more attention to the lucrative theme. Thus, the industry will be well-financed, strengthened, revitalized and local movies will become more competitive in domestic and international territories due to their overall higher quality. In other words, government support is fruitful in many ways. In conclusion, foreign films are extremely popular due to their quality and novelty, supporting the country’s film industry may make the movies produced locally more competitive.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Moves
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
abroad are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
more popular than
locally
made ones. Below
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible reasons for the trend will
be discussed
, and whether a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
ought to buttress
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
or not will
be considered
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, foreign films are popular due to several reasons.
Firstly
, Hollywood and European
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
usually
have better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of picture, more interesting plot, spectacular special effects and star
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
actors and actresses. Those features incentivize public to spend their money and time on watching the overseas product.
Secondly
, a novel and peculiar culture oftentimes is
being presented
in films shot abroad. In fact, each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
represents new prospect on the reality and the values of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
in which it was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
. Viewers who seek emotions and novel, mind-breaking outlook on life
are drawn
to the unusual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
created in distant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Those are two secrets of the success of foreign films.

Furthermore
, the overwhelming popularity of overseas cinema,
in particular
, American one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
sponsoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industries
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
structures a worthwhile endeavor.
Primarily
, this step may stimulate the production of films that will promote national interests, values, traditions and a feeling of patriotism. This investment will likely have an advantageous impact on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
culture that
is threatened
by the spreading Hollywood influence.
In addition
, allocating money to national
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
has a benevolent effect on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
and motivates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
businesses to pay more attention to the lucrative theme.
Thus
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
will be well-financed, strengthened, revitalized and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
will become more competitive in domestic and international territories due to their
overall
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
.
In other words
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
support is fruitful in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways.

In conclusion
, foreign films are
extremely
popular due to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
and novelty, supporting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
film
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
produced
locally
more competitive.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay 11/10/2017Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts