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1 Some people think watching TV is bad for children while others think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children Discuss both views and give your own opinion v.2

1 Some people think watching TV is bad for children while others think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children 2
It is often argued that watching television exerts pernicious impacts upon youngsters. In my opinion, however, I strongly believe that the advantages of watching television far outweigh the disadvantages. On the one hand, it cannot be denied that watching TV has some negative consequences. Firstly, watching TV too long is detrimental for children’s health. To be more specific, it can lead to such problems as: fatigue, eye strain and obesity. Secondly, some programs even include sexual and violent images which are inappropriate for adolescents to watch. Exposure to such kinds of contents on the screen can put them at a higher risk of copying the behavior. Finally, advertisers direct their marketing at children so they are more likely to put their parents under pressure to buy useless commodity on TV. On the other hand, I think that TV plays a vital role in children development. In fact, it is one of the favorite ways to wind down after a hard day at school, which helps a lot in escaping from stress and resulting in higher efficiency at schools. Furthermore, watching different kinds of shows broadens youngsters’ horizons and provides them with limitless knowledge in reality life. For instance, Planet Earth and Discovery Channel not only take the viewers into unknown natural habitats which are home to various flora and fauna but also educate them about the importance of preserving the wonders of the Earth. In conclusion, although many people think that watching TV is harmful, I personally reckon that it brings more benefits to children.
It is
often
argued that watching television exerts pernicious impacts upon youngsters. In my opinion,
however
, I
strongly
believe that the advantages of watching television far outweigh the disadvantages.

On the one hand, it cannot
be denied
that watching TV has
some
negative
consequences.
Firstly
, watching TV too long is detrimental for
children’s
health. To be more specific, it can lead to such problems as: fatigue, eye strain and obesity.
Secondly
,
some
programs even include sexual and violent images which are inappropriate for adolescents to
watch
. Exposure to such kinds of contents on the screen can put them at a higher
risk
of copying the behavior.
Finally
, advertisers direct their marketing at
children
so
they are more likely to put their parents under pressure to
buy
useless commodity on TV.

On the other hand
, I
think
that TV plays a vital role in
children
development. In fact, it is one of the favorite ways to wind down after a
hard
day at school, which
helps
a lot in escaping from
stress
and resulting in higher efficiency at schools.
Furthermore
, watching
different
kinds of
shows
broadens youngsters’ horizons and provides them with limitless knowledge in reality life.
For instance
, Planet Earth and Discovery Channel not
only
take the viewers into unknown natural habitats which are home to various flora and fauna
but
also
educate them about the importance of preserving the wonders of the Earth.

In conclusion
, although
many
people
think
that watching TV is harmful, I
personally
reckon that it brings more benefits to
children
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay 1 Some people think watching TV is bad for children while others think that watching TV has more beneficial effects on children 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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