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The two pie charts show the proportion of population and area in seven continents in percentage terms. v.2

The two pie charts show the proportion of population and area in seven continents in percentage terms. v. 2
The given pie charts depicts that the area and population proportion occurs in seven continents. In a bird' s view, in case of area like Africa placed in second step but in population it is placed in third step similar to Oceania and Antarctica. With regards to area, the largest continent witnessed as Asia at about 30%. Then, the second largest is recorded as Africa at around 20%. These both are considered the half of the total percentage. In terms of North America and South America placed approximately 28%. Subsequently, other three continents such as Antarctica, Europe and Oceania considered as very least amount of areas which are (9%, 7%, 6%) respectively. Thus, the very small continent experienced as Oceania. Asia concerned with the very largest continent, so the population also enjoyed at 58%. Consequently, Africa replaced as Europe in a same place at about 16%. In terms of Africa the third largest population rate approximately 11%. Thereafter, North America, South America and Oceania recorded at very least amount of population exception of Antarctica. Then, this kept as last indeed, the number of population rate is absolutely zero. Having decoded the pie charts, continents like Asia is the only one which is recorded as highest rate of area and to the population while, Antarctica has been vast difference with each other.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie charts depicts that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
proportion occurs in seven
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
continents
. In a
Possible spelling mistake found.
bird&
#039; s view, in case of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
like Africa placed in second step
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
it
is placed
in third step similar to Oceania and Antarctica.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
, the largest continent witnessed as Asia at about 30%. Then, the second largest
is recorded
as Africa at around 20%. These both
are considered
the half of the total percentage. In terms of North America and South America placed approximately 28%.
Subsequently
, other three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
continents
such as Antarctica, Europe and Oceania considered as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
least amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
which are (9%, 7%, 6%)
respectively
.
Thus
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
continent experienced as Oceania.

Asia concerned with the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
largest continent,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
also
enjoyed at 58%.
Consequently
, Africa replaced as Europe in a same place at about 16%. In terms of Africa the third largest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
rate approximately 11%. Thereafter, North America, South America and Oceania recorded at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
least amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
The usual collocation for "exception" in this context is "to" not "of". Did you mean "exception to"?
exception of
Antarctica. Then, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
as last
indeed
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
rate is
absolutely
zero.

Having decoded the pie charts,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
continents
like Asia is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one which
is recorded
as highest rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
and to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
while, Antarctica has been vast difference with each other.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS academic The two pie charts show the proportion of population and area in seven continents in percentage terms. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
221 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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