Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The two pie charts illustrates the proportion of male and females in employment that are divided into six different field of occupations and are equally divided to manual and non-manual category in Great Britain in the year 1992. v.2

The two pie charts illustrates the proportion of male and females in employment that are divided into six different field of occupations and are equally divided to manual and non-manual category in Great Britain in the year 1992. v. 2
The two pie charts illustrates the proportion of male and females in employment that were divided into six different field of occupations and are equally divided to manual and non-manual category in Great Britain in the year 1992. Overall, it was clear that for both sexes, the highest percentage accounted for managerial and professional occupation under non-manual category, while the least proportion for men and women works as general laborers under manual category. In the manual occupations, men and women had almost leveled out in the “other manual” occupations with over a quarter. In contrast, the percentage of crafts occupation for males were nearly a quarter and it had an eight-fold difference from the proportion of female group at only 3%. Then for general laborers, male were only higher with one percent compared to females at 2% and 1%, accordingly. For non-manual occupations, in the managerial and professional field, male were higher at more than a third compared to women which were only less than a third. But, for clerical or related jobs, women dominated at 31%, which was a quarter difference to the proportion of men. Apparently, other non-manual occupations, both sexes accounted for less than one in ten, having the female group higher by 3%.
The two pie charts illustrates the
proportion
of male and
females
in employment that
were divided
into six
different
field
of
occupations
and are
equally
divided to manual and non-manual category in Great Britain in the year 1992.

Overall
, it was
clear
that for both sexes, the highest percentage accounted for managerial and professional
occupation
under non-manual category, while the least
proportion
for
men
and
women
works as general laborers under manual category.

In the manual
occupations
,
men
and
women
had almost leveled out in the “other manual”
occupations
with over a quarter.
In contrast
, the percentage of crafts
occupation
for
males
were
nearly
a quarter and it had an eight-fold difference from the
proportion
of
female
group at
only
3%. Then for general laborers, male were
only
higher with one percent compared to
females
at 2% and 1%,
accordingly
.

For non-manual
occupations
, in the managerial and professional field, male were higher at more than a third compared to
women
which were
only
less than a third.
But
, for clerical or related jobs,
women
dominated at 31%, which was a quarter difference to the
proportion
of
men
.
Apparently
, other non-manual
occupations
, both sexes accounted for less than one in ten, having the
female
group higher by 3%.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS academic The two pie charts illustrates the proportion of male and females in employment that are divided into six different field of occupations and are equally divided to manual and non-manual category in Great Britain in the year 1992. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
207 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts