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The two charts show the main sources of energy in the USA in 1980 and 1990. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant. v.2

The two charts show the main sources of energy in the USA in 1980 and 1990.
The two pie charts compare the production of the major sources of energy in the USA between 1980 and 1990. Overall what stands out from the both charts are that there was an significant increase in the use of coal, whereas the use of oil decreased markedly over the time period mentioned in the question. Looking at the details, although non renewable energy oil represented just over the two fifths of total energy sources, there was considerable decline to 33% constituting only an one third in 1990. However, in regards to another important natural gas that witnessed a slight decrease between 26% and 25% from 1980 to 1990. Even though initially coal stood at 22%, over the next decade, there was a marked rise in the demand of it to 27%. Likewise coal, nuclear power energy followed the same trend which meant that the application of this type of energy rose doubled from 5% to 10% in a 10 year period. While in case of hydroelectric power source, negligible increase in it' s use was noticed between 5% and 6 % as opposed to gas which was as similar as in the beginning of the period.
The two pie charts compare the production of the major sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
in the USA between 1980 and 1990.
Overall
what stands out from the both charts are that there was
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
significant increase in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of coal, whereas the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of oil decreased
markedly
over the time period mentioned in the question.

Looking at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, although
It appears that a hyphen is missing.
non renewable
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energy
oil represented
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over the two fifths of total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
sources, there was considerable decline to 33% constituting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
one third in 1990.
However
,
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
in regards to
another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
natural gas that witnessed a slight decrease between 26% and 25% from 1980 to 1990.
Even though
initially
coal stood at 22%, over the
next
decade, there was a marked rise in the demand of it to 27%.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Likewise
coal, nuclear power
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
followed the same trend which meant that the application of this type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
rose doubled from 5% to 10% in a
When a number forms part of an adjectival compound, use a hyphen: "10-year"
10 year
period. While in case of hydroelectric power source, negligible increase in
Possible spelling mistake found.
it&
#039; s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
was noticed
between 5% and 6 % as opposed to gas which was as similar as in the beginning of the period.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Change your language and you change your thoughts.
Karl Albrecht

IELTS academic The two charts show the main sources of energy in the USA in 1980 and 1990.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
196 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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