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The graph shows average carbon dioxide emissions per person in the UK, Sweden, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007. Summarize the information by selecting the main features and make comparison where relevant. v.2

The graph shows average carbon dioxide emissions per person in the UK, Sweden, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.
The graph illustrate the amount of carbon dioxide per person, which was emitted by the United Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal from 1967 to 2007. Overall, although, the United Kingdom, decreased the average carbon dioxide emissions per person continually, it had the highest share of emitting. In addition, Italy and Portugal released carbon dioxide increasingly. In 1967, the United Kingdom by emitting more than 10 metric tonnes carbon dioxide per person averagely. By passing the time the UK was able to reduce this amount to 8 metric tonnes in 2007, nevertheless, throughout the described interval, the United Kingdom was the first country. Trend of average carbon dioxide emission in Sweden had a different behavior, first of the all from 1967 to 1977, with a stunning rise, it reached at 10 metric tonnes and then, reduced to less than 6 metric tonnes. On the other hand, Italy and Portugal evacuated 4. 5 and 1. 5 metric tonnes carbon dioxide per person respectively, while both countries, increased the emission of carbon dioxide per person and in 2007, Italy emitted 6 and Portugal released 8 metric tonnes carbon dioxide per person. in fact, in 2007 Sweden released the latest amount of carbon dioxide per person.
The graph
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "illustrates".
illustrate
the amount of
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carbon
dioxide per
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person
, which
was emitted
by the
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United
Kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal from 1967 to 2007.

Overall
, although, the
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United
Kingdom, decreased the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide emissions per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
continually
, it had the highest share of emitting.
In addition
, Italy and Portugal released
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carbon
dioxide
increasingly
.

In 1967, the
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United
Kingdom by emitting more than 10 metric tonnes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
averagely
. By passing the time the UK was able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
this amount to 8 metric tonnes in 2007,
nevertheless
, throughout the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
interval, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom was the
first
country. Trend of average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide emission in Sweden had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
behavior,
first
of the all from 1967 to 1977, with a stunning rise, it reached at 10 metric tonnes and then,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to less than 6 metric tonnes.

On the other hand
, Italy and Portugal evacuated 4. 5 and 1. 5 metric tonnes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
respectively
, while both countries, increased the emission of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
and in 2007, Italy emitted 6 and Portugal released 8 metric tonnes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
fact, in 2007 Sweden released the latest amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
person
.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS academic The graph shows average carbon dioxide emissions per person in the UK, Sweden, Italy, and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
202 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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