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The table chart and pie chart give information about the total value and sources of fish imported to us between 1988 and 2000. v.2

The table chart and pie chart give information about the total value and sources of fish imported to us between 1988 and 2000. v. 2
The table chart illustrate the total earning from import fish to us between 1988 & 2000 while pie chart depicts that different sources from where fishes are imported to us at same time. It is clear that, sales of fish during the period from 1988 to 2000 increased. While Canada was major source of fish imported in 1988, for it stood at least position in 2000. Remaining two source, sale rose gradually throughout the period. As the table graph shows, annual income from fish import represented at 6. 57 billion of dollars. Afterwards, it increased by 2 billion of dollars in 1992. By following survey in 2000, 10. 72 billion of dollars had been acquire from only one source import fishes. From the pic graph, In terms of Canada, the figure for exporting fish in 1988 accounted for about 60% which was the highest throughout the period. Afterwards it experienced a decrease to 34% in 1992 and 28% in 2000. As well as it stood at the lowest position among all sources. Furthermore, only 13% fish had been sold in 1988 from China compared to 27% from other. But in next four years, both categories witness an rise to 20% from China and 46% from other respectively. In addition, The proportion of fish exported from China represented at 30% and from other countries, fish had been sold only at 42% in 2000.
The table chart illustrate the total earning from import fish to us between 1988
Possible spelling mistake found.
&amp
; 2000 while pie chart depicts that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
from where fishes
are imported
to us at same time.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that, sales of fish during the period from 1988 to 2000 increased. While Canada was major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of fish imported in 1988, for it stood at least position in 2000. Remaining two
Possible agreement error. The noun 'source' seems to be countable, so consider using: "sources".
source
, sale rose
gradually
throughout the period.

As the table graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
, annual income from fish import represented at 6. 57 billion of dollars. Afterwards, it increased by 2 billion of dollars in 1992. By following survey in 2000, 10. 72 billion of dollars had been
Consider using a past participle here: "acquired".
acquire
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
import fishes.

From the pic graph, In terms of Canada, the figure for exporting fish in 1988 accounted for about 60% which was the highest throughout the period. Afterwards it experienced a decrease to 34% in 1992 and 28% in 2000.
As well
as it stood at the lowest position among all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
.
Furthermore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
13% fish had
been sold
in 1988 from China compared to 27% from other.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in
next
four years, both categories witness
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
rise to 20% from China and 46% from other
respectively
.
In addition
, The proportion of fish exported from China represented at 30% and from other countries, fish had
been sold
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
at 42% in 2000.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
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Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS academic The table chart and pie chart give information about the total value and sources of fish imported to us between 1988 and 2000. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
232 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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