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The table below shows the worldwide market share of mobile phone market for manufacturers in the years 2005 and 2006. v.2

The table below shows the worldwide market share of mobile phone market for manufacturers in the years 2005 and 2006. v. 2
A glance at the statistical information provided represents about global marketing share of the cell phone campanies during the period 2005 and 2006. Overall, the percentage of Nokia was the higher then all other companies in 2005 and 2006. In addition companies as Motorolla, Samsung and some another firm had significant rates then other companies indicated in the table. It can be clearly seen through the diagram that the biggest proportion is in the Nokia with almost one third in 2005 and 35 percent in 2006. However cmpanies like Motorolla and Samsung also had considerable number of market sharing with 17. 7 to 12. 7 in first year and 21. 1 to 11. 8 in the next year. Also evident is the fact that Sone Ericsson and L. G had almost at similar level in 2005 with 6. 3 and 6. 7. However figure of Sony Ericsson figured out by 7. 4 and L. G dropped slightly to 6. 3. The most striking point is that the rate of some other companies made up to 19. 2 in 2005 and 16. 2 in 2006 altogether.
A glance at the statistical information provided represents about global marketing share of the cell phone
campanies
during the period 2005 and 2006.

Overall
, the percentage of Nokia was the
higher then
all other
companies
in 2005 and 2006. In
addition
companies
as
Motorolla
, Samsung and
some
another firm had significant rates then other
companies
indicated in the table.

It can be
clearly
seen
through the diagram that the biggest proportion is in the Nokia with almost one third in 2005 and 35 percent in 2006.
However
cmpanies
like
Motorolla
and Samsung
also
had considerable number of market sharing with 17. 7 to 12. 7 in
first
year and 21. 1 to 11. 8 in the
next
year.
Also
evident is the fact that
Sone
Ericsson and L. G had almost at similar level in 2005 with 6. 3 and 6. 7.
However
figure of Sony Ericsson figured out by 7. 4 and L. G dropped
slightly
to 6. 3. The most striking point is that the rate of
some
other
companies
made up to 19. 2 in 2005 and 16. 2 in 2006 altogether.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes

IELTS academic The table below shows the worldwide market share of mobile phone market for manufacturers in the years 2005 and 2006. v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
185 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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