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The table below gives information on UK acid rain emissions, measured in millions of tonnes, from four different sectors between 1990 and 2007 v.2

The table below gives information on UK acid rain emissions, measured in millions of tonnes, from four different sectors between 1990 and 2007 v. 2
The line graph illustrates the amount of acid rain emissions in UK from four different sectors over a 17-year period. At first glance, it is evident that the total amount of acid rain emissions dramatically declined from 1990 to 2007. In 1990 the amount of acid rain emissions from electricity, gas and water supply sector was the highest, at 3. 5 million tonnes. However, it dramatically decreased to only 0. 5 million tonnes in 2007. Other industries sector produced around 2 million tonnes in 1991, which was the second highest. Nevertheless from 1993 to 2007 there was a gradual fall in acid rain emissions from other industries sector, at around 1. 2 million tonnes. The amount of acid rain emissions from transport and communication sector and domestic sector were not significant difference. Otherwise emissions from transport and communication sector fluctuated between 0. 6 and 0. 7 million tonnes, reaching approximately 0. 7 million tonnes in 2007. While the amount of acid rain emissions from domestic sector slightly reduced to only 0. 2 million tonnes in 2007.
The line graph illustrates the
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amount
of
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acid
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rain
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emissions
in UK from four
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different
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sectors
over a 17-year period. At
first
glance, it is evident that the total
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amount
of
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acid
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rain
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emissions
dramatically
declined from 1990 to 2007.

In 1990 the
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amount
of
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acid
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rain
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emissions
from electricity, gas and water supply
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sector
was the highest, at 3. 5
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million
tonnes.
However
, it
dramatically
decreased to
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only
0. 5
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million
tonnes in 2007. Other industries
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sector
produced around 2
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million
tonnes in 1991, which was the second highest.
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Nevertheless
from 1993 to 2007 there was a gradual fall in
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acid
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rain
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emissions
from other industries
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sector
, at around 1. 2
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million
tonnes.

The
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amount
of
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acid
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rain
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emissions
from transport and communication
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sector
and domestic
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sector
were not significant difference.
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Otherwise
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emissions
from transport and communication
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sector
fluctuated between 0. 6 and 0. 7
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million
tonnes, reaching approximately 0. 7
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
tonnes in 2007.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the
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amount
of
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acid
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rain
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emissions
from domestic
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sector
slightly
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reduced
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
0. 2
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million
tonnes in 2007.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
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IELTS academic The table below gives information on UK acid rain emissions, measured in millions of tonnes, from four different sectors between 1990 and 2007 v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
176 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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