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The table below gives information about online activities of people in different age groups. v.2

The table below gives information about online activities of people in different age groups. v. 2
The table gives information on the online activities of people based on their age groups. Comparing those activities, it can be said that getting news is the most popular online activity among the internet users of all ages. Getting back to details, at least 70% people in all age groups use the Internet to get news and it goes to as high as 76% in teenage groups. While slightly more than 80% teenagers play online games, it drops to over 50% of people in their twenties and 37% when they are in their thirties. Interestingly people over 70 years old like online games more than the people between 40 and 60 do. Digital content download activity is mostly popular among the younger citizens and it drops with the increase of people’s ages. For instance, teenagers’ download accounts for 52% while this drops as low as 6% when people are over 70 years old. Online product research shows a reverse trend and seems like more popular among the adults than the younger people. Adults more or less do 70 to 83 percent online research while this is only 2% among teens. Buying online is equally popular among all internet users and this activity ranges from 43% (the lowest) among teens to 69% (the highest) among people in thirties. Searching for people does not seem like a very popular activity as only 5% teenager do it while the adults’ portion of this activity ranges from 23 to 31 percent. Social networking is more popular among the younger netizens while less common among the aged population. Finally, watching online videos is more popular among the people in their twenties and fifties.
The table gives information on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
based on their age groups. Comparing those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activities
, it can
be said
that getting news is the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
among the internet users of all ages.

Getting back to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, at least 70%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in all age groups
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the Internet to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
news and it goes to as high as 76% in teenage groups. While
slightly
more than 80%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
play
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
games, it drops to over 50% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their twenties and 37% when they are in their thirties.
Interestingly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
over 70 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
games more than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
between 40 and 60 do. Digital content download
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
is
mostly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
among the younger citizens and it drops with the increase of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
ages.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
’ download accounts for 52% while
Did you mean "these"?
this
drops as low as 6% when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are over 70 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Online
product research
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
a reverse trend and seems like more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
among the adults than the younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Adults more or less do 70 to 83 percent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
research while this is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2% among teens. Buying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is
equally
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
among all internet users and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
ranges from 43% (the lowest) among teens to 69% (the highest) among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in thirties. Searching for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
does
not seem like a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
do it while the adults’ portion of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
activity
ranges from 23 to 31 percent. Social networking is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
among the younger netizens while less common among the aged population.
Finally
, watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
videos is more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
popular
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in their twenties and fifties.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
33Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS academic The table below gives information about online activities of people in different age groups. v. 2

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
278 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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