Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

The plan below shows a typical American and Japanese office Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant v.1

The plan below shows a typical American and Japanese office
The maps illustrate arrangements of typical offices in Japan and the US. Overall, there are significant differences about positions of personnel and functional facilities. Additionally, while there are many specific areas such as Conference Room or Storage in a typical American office, a typical Japanese office does not have. While white-collar workers in Japanese offices gather in groups of six people, those in America are evenly separated in the middle of the room. Besides, there is a distinction about the way managers arranged between two countries. In Japan, each section manager locates in front of a group of workers and behind the position of department manager, compared with arrangement of managers’ area in the US that is completely in the right of personnel. On the other hand, there are functional locations in the US offices included Printer, Copier, Storage and Conference Room, whereas Japanese offices have no. While offices in America have two windows on the left and right sides, there is only one large window behind the department manager’s position in the Japanese offices.
The maps illustrate arrangements of typical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
in Japan and the US.

Overall
, there are significant differences about positions of personnel and functional facilities.
Additionally
, while there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
specific areas such as Conference Room or Storage in a typical American
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
, a typical Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
office
does not have.

While white-collar workers in Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
gather in groups of six
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, those in America are
evenly
separated in the middle of the room.
Besides
, there is a distinction about the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
managers
arranged between two countries. In Japan, each section
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
manager
locates in front of a group of workers and behind the position of department
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
manager
, compared with arrangement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
managers’
area in the US
that is
completely in the right of personnel.

On the other hand
, there are functional locations in the US
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
included Printer, Copier, Storage and Conference Room, whereas Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
have no. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
in America have two windows on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
and right sides, there is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one large window behind the department
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
manager’s
position in the Japanese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
offices
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Language is to the mind more than light is to the eye.
William Gibson

IELTS academic The plan below shows a typical American and Japanese office

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
175 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts