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The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010. v.5

The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010. v. 5
The pie charts represent the households spending on six different goods and services (housing, food, health care, education, transportation and other) in a percentage between 1950 and 2010. Overall, the household expenditure was mainly spent on housings in 1950 but this has changed by 2010 where the household spent on variety of goods and services (foods, housing, others and transportation). In 1950, the households spent the most money on housing which recorded of 72. 1%, followed by food factors which had 11. 2% of household expenditures and the education indicated the third largest portion of household expenditures had used of 6. 6% of money. Meanwhile, there was a minimal proportion of household money spent on the rest of goods and services of below 5% in the same year. By 2010, the household expenditures spent on various goods and services. A 34% of household expenditures had used to purchase food whereas housing spending decreased to 22%. Other and transportation had the third largest share of the household expenditures of 19. 2% and 14% respectively in 2010. Concurrently, there was a similar proportion of household expenses had consumed for education and health care.
The pie charts represent the
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households
spending on six
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different
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goods
and
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services
(housing,
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food
, health care, education, transportation and other) in a percentage between 1950 and 2010.

Overall
, the
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household
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expenditure
was
mainly
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spent
on housings in 1950
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but
this has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
by 2010 where the
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household
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spent
on variety of
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goods
and
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services
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(foods
, housing, others and transportation).

In 1950, the
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households
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spent
the most money on housing which recorded of 72. 1%, followed by
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food
factors which had 11. 2% of
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household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditures
and the education indicated the third largest portion of
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household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditures
had
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used
of 6. 6% of money. Meanwhile, there was a minimal proportion of
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household
money
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spent
on the rest of
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goods
and
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services
of below 5% in the same year.

By 2010, the
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household
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expenditures
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spent
on various
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goods
and
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services
. A 34% of
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household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditures
had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
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purchase
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food
whereas housing spending decreased to 22%. Other and transportation had the third largest share of the
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household
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expenditures
of 19. 2% and 14%
respectively
in 2010.
Concurrently
, there was a similar proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
household
expenses had consumed for education and health care.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
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IELTS academic The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010. v. 5

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
191 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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