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The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010. v.2

The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010. v. 2
The two pie charts compare the average nationwide expenses on several household categories including housing, food, healthcare, education, transportation in 1950 and 2010. The expenditure ratio for food soared in 6 decades while an overwhelming portion of the expenditure went on for housing in 1950. Now turning to the details, the bulk of the expenses in 1950 was made for the housing and food which accounted for a massive 72. 1% and 11. 2% of the total expenditures. In opposite, it can be observed that people prioritised buying food (34%) more than housing (22%) six decades later. Health care had the lowest amount of money spent on in both of the years. In addition, transportation expenses had remarkably increased by roughly three times from only 3. 3% in 1950 to 14% in 2010. Aside from that, spending on other items also rose to 19. 3% from 4. 4% in 1950. Education expense ratio, however, had slightly decreased where people insignificantly spent 0. 3% more in 1960 than in 2010. To summarise, basic necessities such as food and housing are the two main categories people spent most percentages of money on, however, health care aspect was the least prioritised.
The two pie charts compare the average nationwide expenses on several household categories including housing,
food
, healthcare, education, transportation in 1950 and 2010. The expenditure ratio for
food
soared in 6 decades while an overwhelming portion of the expenditure went on for housing in 1950.

Now
turning to the
details
, the bulk of the expenses in 1950
was made
for the housing and
food
which accounted for a massive 72. 1% and 11. 2% of the total expenditures. In opposite, it can
be observed
that
people
prioritised
buying
food
(34%) more than housing (22%) six decades later. Health care had the lowest amount of money spent on in both of the years.
In addition
, transportation expenses had
remarkably
increased by roughly three times from
only
3. 3% in 1950 to 14% in 2010. Aside from that, spending on other items
also
rose to 19. 3% from 4. 4% in 1950. Education
expense
ratio,
however
, had
slightly
decreased where
people
insignificantly
spent 0. 3% more in 1960 than in 2010.

To
summarise
,
basic necessities
such as
food
and housing are the two main categories
people
spent most percentages of money on,
however
, health care aspect was the least
prioritised
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS academic The pie charts below show the average household expenditures in a country in 1950 and 2010. v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
198 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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