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The graph below shows the population figures of different types of wild birds in the United Kingdom between 1970 and 2004. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. v.2

The graph below shows the population figures of different types of wild birds in the United Kingdom between 1970 and 2004.
The graph indicates the index figures of different categories of wild birds between the years 1970 and 2004 in the United Kingdom. It uses an index starting at 100 in 1970 and the figures are shown yearly. The all species category show the overall index between coastal, woodland and farmland species. It shows a growth from 100 to 110 by the year 1977, after that it fluctuated widely between 110 to 100 index points. There is a rise in coastal species from 1970 to 1980 when the figure reached a peak at 135 index points, then, there is a fluctuation, until 2004, keeping similar figures. There is a rose on woodland species from 1970 to 1972, reaching a high at 110 points, after that the graph shows a downward trend, reaching 85 index points in 1992, after that, the figures remained steady. The fourth category, farmland species reached 110 index points in 1776, after that the population dropped dramatically, showing 55 points in 1998, being this the lowest point reached by the four categories represented. Coastal species is the only category above the overall, showing the most important growth, while the farmland species population plunged. Woodland species displays a decrease in its figures, below the All species category.
The graph indicates the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
index
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figures
of
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different
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categories
of wild birds between the years 1970 and 2004 in the United Kingdom. It
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uses
an
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index
starting at 100 in 1970 and the
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figures
are shown
yearly.

The all species
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category
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the
overall
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index
between coastal, woodland and farmland species. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
a growth from 100 to 110 by the year 1977, after that it fluctuated
widely
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 110 and 100".
between 110 to 100
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index
points.

There is a rise in coastal species from 1970 to 1980 when the
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figure
reached a peak at 135
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index
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points
, then, there is a fluctuation, until 2004, keeping similar figures.

There is a rose on woodland species from 1970 to 1972, reaching a high at 110
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points
, after that the graph
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shows
a downward trend, reaching 85
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index
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points
in 1992, after that, the
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figures
remained steady.

The fourth
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category
, farmland species reached 110
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index
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points
in 1776, after that the population dropped
dramatically
, showing 55
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points
in 1998, being this the lowest
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point
reached by the four
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categories
represented.

Coastal species is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
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category
above the
overall
, showing the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
growth, while the farmland species population plunged. Woodland species displays a decrease in its
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figures
, below
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "All"?
the All
species
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category
.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the population figures of different types of wild birds in the United Kingdom between 1970 and 2004.

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
208 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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