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The graph below shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000. v.1

The graph below shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000. v. 1
The column graph represents information on travellers’ commuting preference to reach office and return home in a European city in three different years- 1960, 1980 and 2000. overall, the car gained its popularity and the number of people who used to walk gradually decreased. In 1960, almost 20 percent people used buses to and from workplaces and this percentage grew to almost 28% after 20 years. In 2000, bus users fell to less than 20%. On the contrary, in the case of private cars, the users were only about 7% in 1960, which was the lowest among the 4 categories, and this increased sharply in 1980 amounting 25%, and in 2000, more than 38%, making it the most used form of the transportation system. Besides, more than 27% people used bikes in 1960 and in 1980 the number decreased by 5% but in 2000 it dramatically fell to somewhat 7%. Finally, 35% people used to walk to go to work and to return from there. But this foot-walkers' number declined significantly in the 80s and in 2000 one out of ten office goers walked. To summarise, more people used to walk to travel to and from workplaces in 1960 but with the popularity of private cars, this ratio declined.
The column graph represents information on
travellers
’ commuting preference to reach office and return home in a European city in three
different
years- 1960, 1980 and 2000.
overall
, the car gained its popularity and the number of
people
who
used
to walk
gradually
decreased.

In 1960, almost 20 percent
people
used
buses to and from workplaces and this percentage grew to almost 28% after 20 years. In 2000, bus users fell to less than 20%.
On the contrary
, in the case of private cars, the users were
only
about 7% in 1960, which was the lowest among the 4 categories, and this increased
sharply
in 1980 amounting 25%, and in 2000, more than 38%, making it the most
used
form of the transportation system.

Besides
, more than 27%
people
used
bikes in 1960 and in 1980 the number decreased by 5%
but
in 2000 it
dramatically
fell to somewhat 7%.
Finally
, 35%
people
used
to walk to go to work and to return from there.
But
this foot-walkers' number declined
significantly
in the 80s and in 2000 one out of ten office goers walked.

To
summarise
, more
people
used
to walk to travel to and from workplaces in 1960
but
with the popularity of private cars, this ratio declined.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS academic The graph below shows the different modes of transport used to travel to and from work in one European city in 1960, 1980 and 2000. v. 1

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
209 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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