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The graph below shows how the prices of apples and oranges changed between 2010 and 2014 in Australia. v.1

The graph below shows how the prices of apples and oranges changed between 2010 and 2014 in Australia. v. 1
The bar graph compares price variations of apples and oranges in Australia over a 5-year period, commencing from 2010. Overall, the price of these two fruits went up every year and orange became more expensive than apples in later years despite a reverse price scenario in early years. According to the diagram, per pound apple cost approximately 4. 5 dollars in 2010 in Australia. At that time, the price of per pound orange was 4 dollar. Next year, the price of both fruits increased and it took roughly 5 dollars to purchase one pound apple while per pound orange was sold at just over 4 dollars. Interestingly, the price of apple and orange in 2012 became almost identical – 5 dollar. After a year, orange was slightly expensive than apple as their prices were nearly 5 dollars 10 cents and 5 dollars 20 cents respectively. In the final year, 2014,   the orange became even more expensive than apples. At that time, apple was sold for roughly 5 dollars 20 cents per pound while it was approximately 70 cents more for the same amount of orange.
The bar graph compares
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price
variations of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apples
and oranges in Australia over a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
5-year
period, commencing from 2010.
Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of these two fruits went up every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
and orange became more expensive than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apples
in later years despite a reverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
scenario in early years.

According to the diagram, per pound
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apple
cost approximately 4. 5
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dollars
in 2010 in Australia. At that time, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of per pound orange was 4
Possible agreement error. The noun 'dollar' seems to be countable, so consider using: "dollars".
dollar
.
Next
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year
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of both fruits increased and it took roughly 5
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dollars
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
one pound
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apple
while per pound orange
was sold
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 4
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dollars
.
Interestingly
, the
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price
of
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apple
and orange in 2012 became almost identical
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
5
Possible agreement error. The noun 'dollar' seems to be countable, so consider using: "dollars".
dollar
. After a
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year
, orange was
slightly
Use "(expensive)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
expensive
than
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apple
as their
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prices
were
nearly
5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
10 cents and 5
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dollars
20 cents
respectively
. In the final
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year
, 2014,
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
the orange became even more expensive than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apples
. At that time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
apple
was sold
for roughly 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
20 cents per pound while it was approximately 70 cents more for the same amount of orange.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS academic The graph below shows how the prices of apples and oranges changed between 2010 and 2014 in Australia. v. 1

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
186 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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