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The diagram below shows the stages in the recycling of aluminium drinks cans Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant v.2

The diagram below shows the stages in the recycling of aluminium drinks cans
The diagram illustrates the aluminium drinks cans recycling processes. After the cans selling on vending machines, there are three main phases, starting from collecting empty cans, moving them to recycling factory, and re-producing aluminium at the recycling plant. Firstly, aluminium cans are separated from other materials such as steel cans at collection center where empty cans from the neighborhood are gathered. Then, empty cans in different boxes of each material are moved to the recycling center, At the center, aluminium cans are pressed by a machine to create a big block of cans. The blocks of aluminium cans are put into the recycling plant and is heated until they melt enough to create new aluminium bars. The bars are pressed and changes their form to a thin sheet of alumimnium roll. With this roll, new aluminium cans are produced. The cycle is completed when the new cans are slod in drinks machines. In this way, aluminium can be used over and over.
The diagram illustrates the
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
drinks
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cans
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
processes. After the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
selling on vending machines, there are three main phases, starting from collecting empty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
, moving them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
factory, and re-producing
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
plant.

Firstly
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
are separated
from other materials such as steel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
at collection center where empty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
from the neighborhood
are gathered
.

Then, empty
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
boxes of each material are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
center, At the center,
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
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cans
are pressed
by a machine to create a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
block of cans.

The blocks of
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
are put
into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
plant and
is heated
until they melt
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to create new
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
bars. The bars
are pressed
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
their form to a thin sheet of
Possible spelling mistake found.
alumimnium
roll. With this roll, new
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
are produced
.

The cycle
is completed
when the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
slod
in drinks machines. In this way,
Possible spelling mistake. 'aluminium' is British English.
aluminium
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
can
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
over and over.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
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IELTS academic The diagram below shows the stages in the recycling of aluminium drinks cans

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
162 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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