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The diagram below shows the environmental issues raised by a product over its lifecycle. v.1

The diagram below shows the environmental issues raised by a product over its lifecycle. v. 1
The given diagram depicts the lifecycle of a product and the consequences due to its manufacturing. Generally speaking, most of the seven phases of production have a direct effect on the environment. As is observed, the first step in the product manufacturing is planning and designing according to the needs. Then, the manufacturer starts to put the materials into action by consuming the required substances and energy resources, which lead to the third phase - production. It is clearly seen that these two steps have a direct impact on the environment. After that, the product undergoes packaging and distribution to shops and markets. Then, the product is sold to the consumers. Noting that packaging and sales might include adding covers on the product and using bags for selling it, which surely have a negative effect on the environment. Furthermore, after the product is consumed by the customers, it will have two possible destinations, disposing or recycling. Of course, disposing of the product makes it a burden to the environment while recycling it reduces the amount of the materials required for production. Finally, feedbacks are collected to help the designers in their upcoming plans.
The
given
diagram depicts the lifecycle of a
product
and the consequences due to its manufacturing.
Generally
speaking, most of the seven phases of production have a direct effect on the environment.

As
is observed
, the
first
step in the
product
manufacturing is planning and designing according to the needs. Then, the manufacturer
starts
to put the materials into action by consuming the required substances and energy resources, which lead to the third phase
-
production. It is
clearly
seen
that these two steps have a direct impact on the environment. After that, the
product
undergoes packaging and distribution to shops and markets. Then, the
product
is sold
to the consumers. Noting that packaging and sales might include adding covers on the
product
and using bags for selling it, which
surely
have a
negative
effect on the environment.
Furthermore
, after the
product
is consumed
by the customers, it will have two possible destinations, disposing or recycling.
Of course
, disposing of the
product
makes
it a burden to the environment while recycling it
reduces
the amount of the materials required for production.
Finally
, feedbacks
are collected
to
help
the designers in their upcoming plans.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS academic The diagram below shows the environmental issues raised by a product over its lifecycle. v. 1

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
193 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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