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The diagram below shows how the Australian Bureau of Meteorology collects up-to-the-minute information on the weather in order to produce reliable forecasts. v.1

The diagram below shows how the Australian Bureau of Meteorology collects up-to-the-minute information on the weather in order to produce reliable forecasts. v. 1
The given diagram shows how the weather information is collected by Australian Bureau of Meteorology to provide accurate and updated weather forecasting. As is observed from the given illustration, the weather information collection is done via satellites, radars and drifting buoys and then analysed before broadcasting them to the public. As is presented in the diagram, the weather information is collected using three different types of sources namely, satellites, radars and drifting buoys. The raw data collected from satellites is basically satellite photos while radar information is observed from the radar screens and the synoptic charts are yielded from the drifting buoys and these three types of data are fed into a computer system to analyse and prepare the weather news for broadcasting. After that, the weather, the news is broadcasted in different public media like televisions, radios and telephones. The final information regarding the weather is provided to the public via TV news, radio broadcasting and as a recorded announcement in devices like telephones.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
diagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is collected
by Australian Bureau of Meteorology to provide accurate and updated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weather
forecasting. As
is observed
from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
illustration, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
collection
is done
via satellites,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radars
and drifting buoys and then
Possible spelling mistake. 'analysed' is British English.
analysed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
broadcasting them to the public.

As
is presented
in the diagram, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is collected
using three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of sources
namely
, satellites,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radars
and drifting buoys. The raw data collected from satellites is
basically
satellite photos while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
is observed
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
radar
screens and the synoptic charts
are yielded
from the drifting buoys and these three types of data
are fed
into a computer system to
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
and prepare the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weather
news for broadcasting.

After that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weather
, the news
is broadcasted
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
public media like televisions, radios and telephones. The final
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
regarding the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
weather
is provided
to the public via TV news, radio broadcasting and as a recorded announcement in devices like telephones.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS academic The diagram below shows how the Australian Bureau of Meteorology collects up-to-the-minute information on the weather in order to produce reliable forecasts. v. 1

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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