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The diagram below give information on transport and car use in Edmonton. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent. People's reasons for using the car in city. v.2

The diagram below give information on transport and car use in Edmonton.
The pie chart illustrates the detail about, the modes of transportation using in Edmonton, such as: car, LRT, bus and taxi. However, the table shows the purpose of travelling car in the city. The data has been calibrated in percentage. Overall, it can be seen that, car is the most preferable mode of transport by the masses, but, commute to work is the major concern of using car in the city. After minute concentration on this circular chart, it is evident that, the car is considered the most preferable mode of transport by the individuals, which stood at 45%. Followed by, Light Rail Transit it is accounted for 35%. Furthermore, in Edmonton the data of using car and taxi is same at 10% respectively. Turning to the table, the highest usage of car by person' s, in the city for commute to work stood at 55 percentile. Although, in terms of shopping and leisure activities, the usage of car is same in both the cases at 15% sequencely. Meanwhile, for business prospective car is used 45%, but, in case of taking children to school these figures are slightly less.
The pie chart illustrates the detail about, the modes of transportation using in Edmonton, such as:
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
LRT
, bus and taxi.
However
, the table
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the purpose of travelling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
in the city. The data has
been calibrated
in percentage.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is the most preferable mode of transport by the masses,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, commute to work is the major concern of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
in the city.

After minute concentration on this circular chart, it is evident that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is considered
the most preferable mode of transport by the individuals, which stood at 45%. Followed by, Light Rail Transit it
is accounted
for 35%.
Furthermore
, in Edmonton the data of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
and taxi is same at 10%
respectively
.

Turning to the table, the highest usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
person&
#039; s, in the city for commute to work stood at 55
Possible agreement error. The noun 'percentile' seems to be countable, so consider using: "percentiles".
percentile
. Although, in terms of shopping and leisure activities, the usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is same in both the cases at 15%
Possible spelling mistake found.
sequencely
. Meanwhile, for business prospective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
45%,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, in case of taking children to school these figures are
slightly
less.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
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IELTS academic The diagram below give information on transport and car use in Edmonton.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
189 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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