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The chart shows the percentage of people who have moved house either in the last 3 years, between 3 to 5 years or not within the last 5 years v.2

The chart shows the percentage of people who have moved house either in the last 3 years, between 3 to 5 years or not within the last 5 years v. 2
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of people who have changed address within 5 years, within 3 years or remained in the same house for at least 5 years. Overall, it is obvious that there are wide variations in the percentage of people who moved house during certain ages. As can be seen from the chart that despite a few minor differences, those in their twenties and thirties have similar statistics. The proportion of people moving house from 3 to 5 years ago is the highest and the lowest figure is for having not moved in the last 5 years. There are 55 percent of people aged between 40 and 49, which have moved house within 5 years and only 14 percent of people living the same house. By contrast in the next age group, the percentage of people who haved changed address over 3 years ago and those who have remained the same house in the last 5 years are almost the same, at 41 percent and 42 percent respectively, whereas only 17 percent of people having moved within 3 years.
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of
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people
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who
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
address within 5 years, within 3 years or remained in the same
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house
for at least 5 years.
Overall
, it is obvious that there are wide variations in the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
during certain ages.

As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the chart that despite a few minor differences, those in their twenties and thirties have similar statistics. The proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
moving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
from 3 to 5 years ago is the highest and the lowest figure is for having not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moved
in the last 5 years.

There are 55
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "percents"?
percent
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aged between 40 and 49, which have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
within 5 years and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
14
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percent
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
. By contrast in the
next
age group, the percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "had", the past tense form of the verb 'have'?
haved
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
address over 3 years ago and those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have remained the same
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house
in the last 5 years are almost the same, at 41
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percent
and 42
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percent
respectively
, whereas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
17
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
moved
within 3 years.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS academic The chart shows the percentage of people who have moved house either in the last 3 years, between 3 to 5 years or not within the last 5 years v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
182 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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