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The chart below shows the value of one countries exports in various categories during 2015 in 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. v.2

The chart below shows the value of one countries exports in various categories during 2015 in 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. v. 2
The given bar graph and chart show one country' s export of different items and percentage change in export of the respective items in 2015 and 2016. Overall, while a few items, namely petroleum products, engineered textiles, have shown growth in export 2016 compare to exports in 2015, some items like germs and jewelry has decreased in export. The textile export increased from approximately $26 billion in 2015 to $31 billion in 2016. Similar increase can be visible in the items like petroleum products and engineered textiles which are increased from $61 billion to $63 billion and $58 billion to $61 billion respectively. If we look at the percentage increase in export in each product from 2015 to 2016, the growth in textiles was the highest, which is 15. 24% followed by engineered goods and petroleum products, which are stand at 8. 5% and 3% respectively. Moreover, agriculture products were also experience at slight increase of 0. 81%. However, product such as Gems and jewelry was exported less in 2016, which was 5. 18% lower than that of export in 2015
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar graph and chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
one
Possible spelling mistake found.
country&
#039; s
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export
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
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items
and percentage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
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export
of the respective
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items
in 2015 and 2016.

Overall
, while a few
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items
,
namely
petroleum
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products
, engineered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
textiles
, have shown growth in
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export
2016 compare to
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exports
in 2015,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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items
like germs and jewelry has decreased in export.

The
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textile
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export
increased from approximately $26
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billion
in 2015 to $31
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billion
in 2016. Similar increase can be visible in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
like petroleum
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products
and engineered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
textiles
which
are increased
from $61
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billion
to $63
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billion
and $58
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billion
to $61
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billion
respectively
.

If we look at the percentage increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
export
in each
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product
from 2015 to 2016, the growth in
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textiles
was the highest, which is 15. 24% followed by engineered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and petroleum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, which are stand at 8. 5% and 3%
respectively
.
Moreover
, agriculture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
were
also
Consider using a past participle here: "experienced".
experience
at slight increase of 0. 81%.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
such as Gems and jewelry
was exported
less in 2016, which was 5. 18% lower than that of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
export
in 2015
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
28Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS academic The chart below shows the value of one countries exports in various categories during 2015 in 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
180 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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