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The chart below gives information about global sales of games software, CDs and DVD or video. v.1

The chart below gives information about global sales of games software, CDs and DVD or video. v. 1
The given bar graph shows the sales amount of Games, CDs and DVDs in the world from the year 2000 to 2003. As is observed from the graph, the sales volume of games software increased over the year and CDs were the most sold items in terms of its sales amount among the given items though VDVs slowly replaced CDs. According to the data, in the year 2000, the sales amount of CDs was 35 billion dollars worldwide. In this year the sales amount for DVDs/ Video and games were less than 20 billion dollars. The sales amount of these three items remained almost same in the next year with some increment in the sales amount of VDV and games. Over the year the sales amount of CDs decreased and finally reached to just over 30 billion dollars in 2003. On the contrary, the sales amount for DVD/ Video increased significantly and the amount reached almost near the sales amount of the CDs. Similarly, the sales amount of games increased and reached to over 15 billion dollars in 2003. In summary, DVDs gradually replaced the CDs and games software sales increased for the given period of time.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Games
,
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CDs
and DVDs in the world from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2000 to 2003. As
is observed
from the graph, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
volume of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
software
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
CDs
were the most sold items in terms of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
among the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
items though
Possible spelling mistake found.
VDVs
slowly
replaced CDs.

According to the data, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2000, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
CDs
was 35
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
worldwide. In this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
for DVDs/ Video and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
were less than 20
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of these three items remained almost same in the
next
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year
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
increment in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
VDV
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Over
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
CDs
decreased and
finally
reached to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
30
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billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2003.
On the contrary
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
for DVD/ Video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
significantly
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
reached almost near the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
CDs
.
Similarly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
and reached to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2003.

In summary, DVDs
gradually
replaced the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
CDs
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
software
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
increased
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period of time.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
57Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS academic The chart below gives information about global sales of games software, CDs and DVD or video. v. 1

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
197 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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