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The Bar graph below shows the Expenditure in Million Pounds on fast food items by income groups in the UK. v.3

The Bar graph below shows the Expenditure in Million Pounds on fast food items by income groups in the UK. v. 3
The given bar graph shows data on the expenses made by the United Kingdom citizens for the fast food item in 1990. As is observed from the given data, people with high-income group spent more money on fast foods and the hamburger was the most preferred food among the high and average earning people. According to the bar graph, the people who had high income did the maximum expense on the fast food items. Hamburger was the most preferred fast food items both for the average and high earning group people. More than 40 million pounds was expensed by the high earning people in this single fast food items. Two other popular fast food items among the high earning people were Pizza and Fish/ Chips for which the high earners expensed more than 15 million pounds in 1990. Among the average earning people, the second most favourite fast food item was fish/ chips for which they made an expense of 25 million pounds in this year. On the other hand, Pizza was the least popular item among the people of low income and they preferred fish/ chips and hamburger over the pizza.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
data on the expenses made by the United Kingdom citizens for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
item
in 1990. As
is observed
from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
data,
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people
with high-income group spent more money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
and the hamburger was the most preferred
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
among the
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high
and average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earning
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

According to the bar graph, the
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people
who had
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high
income did the maximum expense on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
. Hamburger was the most preferred
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
both for the average and
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high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earning
group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. More than 40 million pounds
was expensed
by the
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high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in this single
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
. Two other popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
items
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were Pizza and Fish/ Chips for which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
earners expensed more than 15 million pounds in 1990.

Among the average
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earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, the second most
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
item
was fish/ chips for which they made an expense of 25 million pounds in this year.
On the other hand
, Pizza was the least popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
item
among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of low
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
income and
they preferred fish/ chips and hamburger over the pizza.
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS academic The Bar graph below shows the Expenditure in Million Pounds on fast food items by income groups in the UK. v. 3

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
192 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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