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The bar chart below The bar chart below shows the percentage of people living alone in 5 different age groups in the US from 1850 to 2000. Summarise the main feature and make comparisons where relevant. v.2

The bar chart below The bar chart below shows the percentage of people living alone in 5 different age groups in the US from 1850 to 2000. Summarise the main feature and make comparisons where relevant. v. 2
The presented bar chart illustrates the proportion occupied by one-person households in 5 distinct age groups in the US between 1850 and 2000. Generally, it is evident that the trend towards living alone raised its popularity among all groups over the period. In addition, despite having undergone different levels of increment, 55-64 remained the group having most numerous one-person households in all marked years. Turning into detail, in 1850, with nearly 3%, people aging 55-64 had the highest proportion of one-person household, followed the same over-2-per-cent figures of 37-46 and 47-54 group. However, the latter’s number grew mildly in 1900, marginally edging out that of the former, but still ranked second due to a growth to about 4% of 55-64 group. Meanwhile, in the first year its data was collected, 27-36 group had the least rate of people living alone, with only over 2%. Regarding to the remainder of the period, it was not until 1950 did the figure relating to people aging 17-26 become available. Specifically, starting at 2% in 1950, it grew considerably to nearly 5% in 2000. Likewise, upward trends were also witnessed in 47-54 and 55-64 group, with significant growths to above 12% and 16% in 2000, respectively. Although the figure for people aging 37-46 maintained its increase, it was surpassed by that of 27-36 group as the third largest number among 5 groups, with 8%.
The presented bar chart illustrates the proportion occupied by one-person households in 5 distinct age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
in the US between 1850 and 2000.

Generally
, it is evident that the trend towards living alone raised its popularity among all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
over the period.
In addition
, despite having undergone
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
levels of increment, 55-64 remained the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
having most numerous one-person households in all marked years.

Turning into detail, in 1850, with
nearly
3%,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aging 55-64 had the highest proportion of one-person household, followed the same over-2-per-cent figures of 37-46 and 47-54
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
.
However
, the latter’s number grew
mildly
in 1900,
marginally
edging out that of the former,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
still
ranked second due to a growth to about 4% of 55-64
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
. Meanwhile, in the
first
year its data
was collected
, 27-36
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
had the least rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living alone, with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
over 2%.

The phrase 'Regarding to' is not correct. Use "Regarding" or "regard to".
Regarding to
the remainder of the period, it was not until 1950 did the figure relating to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aging 17-26 become available.
Specifically
, starting at 2% in 1950, it grew
considerably
to
nearly
5% in 2000.
Likewise
, upward trends were
also
witnessed in 47-54 and 55-64
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, with significant growths to above 12% and 16% in 2000,
respectively
. Although the figure for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
aging 37-46 maintained its increase, it
was surpassed
by that of 27-36
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
as the third largest number among 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
, with 8%.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS academic The bar chart below The bar chart below shows the percentage of people living alone in 5 different age groups in the US from 1850 to 2000. Summarise the main feature and make comparisons where relevant. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
230 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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