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The bar chart below shows the number of houses built per year in two cities, Derby and Nottingham, Between 2000 and 2009. v.1

The bar chart below shows the number of houses built per year in two cities, Derby and Nottingham, Between 2000 and 2009. v. 1
The given bar chart presents information about change in the number of house construction in two difference cities, including Derby and Nottingham, between 2000 and 2009. Overall, it is clear that the number of new houses in these two cities increased steadily through the years, Despite fluctuations, the figures for Derby and Nottingham declined over the period to roughly 350 and 250 in 2009. In 2000, the number of houses in Derby was only 40, which was slightly lower than Nottingham. However, this number grew steadily, reaching over 100 in 2003. But the number then remained constant approximately 120 from 2003 to 2007, before increasing to over 340 in 2009. Turning to the data in Nottingham, in the first two years of the decade, more houses were erected in Nottingham than in Derby. However, construction declined to only 20 in 2002. Over the next three years, houses numbers rose steadily, only to drop practically to zero in 2006. There was then a dramatic surge in 2007 with over 200 houses built. While in 2008 saw house building in Nottingham plummeting to only 10, in 2009 the number of new houses rocketed to 270.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar chart presents information about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
construction in two difference cities, including Derby and Nottingham, between 2000 and 2009.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
in these two cities increased
steadily
through the years, Despite fluctuations, the figures for Derby and Nottingham declined
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
the period to roughly 350 and 250 in 2009.

In 2000, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
in Derby was
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only
40, which was
slightly
lower than Nottingham.
However
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
grew
steadily
, reaching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
100 in 2003.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
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number
then remained constant approximately 120 from 2003 to 2007,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
increasing to
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over
340 in 2009.

Turning to the data in Nottingham, in the
first
two years of the decade, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
were erected
in Nottingham than in Derby.
However
, construction declined to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
20 in 2002.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Over
the
next
three years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
numbers
rose
steadily
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
to drop
practically
to zero in 2006. There was then a dramatic surge in 2007 with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
over
200
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
built. While in 2008
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
building in Nottingham plummeting to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
10, in 2009 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
rocketed to 270.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
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IELTS academic The bar chart below shows the number of houses built per year in two cities, Derby and Nottingham, Between 2000 and 2009. v. 1

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
193 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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