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summarize the information by selecting uk's city from december to november total incidence of violent crime are shown in addition to incidences of four crime types v.2

summarize the information by selecting uk's city from december to november total incidence of violent crime are shown in addition to incidences of four crime types v.2
The line graph depicts the crime rates of a major city in United Kingdom over a year' s time, from December to the November of next year. The description is based on four serious crimes namely, anti-social behaviour, violent crime, robbery and criminal damage. At the outset, crimes related to an anti-social demeanor has taken place the most and has been performed by more than 400 criminals throughout the year. The other crimes are committed by people in lesser numbers and has not experienced great change in count in the addressed timeline. All the categories of crime experienced a slight fall in its number, during the period December to early March. The anti-social crime continued to proliferate over the years with minimal drops in the count at times. It reached a peak of around 650 on October and then started to descend and reached a count of 500 on the month of November. Violent crimes initiated with a crime rate of 200 and showed a steady growth to reach 300 with undulating numbers during the period. The other two crimes did not vary much in the addressed time frame.
The line graph depicts the
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crime
rates of a major city
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the United Kingdom".
in United Kingdom
over a
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year&
#039; s time, from December to the November of
next
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year
. The description
is based
on four serious
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crimes
namely
, anti-social
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, violent
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crime
, robbery and criminal damage.

At the outset,
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crimes
related to an anti-social demeanor has taken place the most and has
been performed
by more than 400 criminals throughout the
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year
. The other
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crimes
are committed
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in lesser numbers and has not experienced great
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in count in the addressed timeline.

All the categories of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
experienced a slight fall in its number, during the period December to early March. The anti-social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
continued to proliferate over the years with minimal drops in the count at times. It reached a peak of around 650 on October and then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to descend and reached a count of 500 on the month of November. Violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
initiated with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
rate of 200 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a steady growth to reach 300 with undulating numbers during the period. The other two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
did not vary much in the addressed time frame.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
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IELTS academic summarize the information by selecting uk's city from december to november total incidence of violent crime are shown in addition to incidences of four crime types v.2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
189 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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