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Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You should write at least 150 words. v.2

Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You should write at least 150 words. v.2
The bar chart illustrates how many parts per million of electricity generation, transport and industry which some countries as China, America, Japan and Australia have. Overall, China are by far the highest number of parts per million which is called PPM for all sectors, while Australia recognises a country has the lowest PPM for Transport and Industry. A glance to the graph provided reveals that China topped the list in Industry, at 80 PPM, which was over twice as much as that of America. It is nearly same in electricity which were nearly 60 PPM in China, compare to over 30 PPM in America. However, transport in America do not have that situation, since they accounted for nearly 60 PPM that were nearly 30 PPM higher than the second highest number in this country. In spite of that number, America still lower than that of China. Not surprisingly, Japan held the third rank because of the third highest number of Industry and Transport, with over 40 PPM and exactly 30 PPM respectively. Certainly, Australia has no change number in Industry and Transport, at nearly 20 PPM, becoming the lowest.
The bar chart illustrates how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parts per million of electricity generation,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries as China, America, Japan and Australia have.

Overall
, China are by far the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of parts per million which
is called
PPM for all sectors, while Australia
Possible spelling mistake. 'recognises' is British English.
recognises
a country has the lowest PPM for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Transport
and Industry.

A glance to the graph provided reveals that China topped the list in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industry
, at 80 PPM, which was over twice as much as that of America. It is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
same in electricity which were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
60 PPM in China, compare to over 30 PPM in America.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
in America do not have that situation, since they accounted for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
60 PPM that were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
30 PPM higher than the second highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
in this country.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
, America
still
lower than that of China.

Not
surprisingly
, Japan held the third rank
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the third highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industry
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Transport
, with over 40 PPM and exactly 30 PPM
respectively
.
Certainly
, Australia has no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Industry
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Transport
, at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nearly
20 PPM, becoming the lowest.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Do you know what a foreign accent is? It’s a sign of bravery.
Amy Chua

IELTS academic Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You should write at least 150 words. v.2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
189 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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