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Some people say that parents should places restrictions on the hours their children spend watching TV and playing computer games, and encourage them to spend this time reading books instead. Do you agree or disagree? v.6

Some people say that parents should places restrictions on the hours their children spend watching TV and playing computer games, and encourage them to spend this time reading books instead. v. 6
It is commonly said that parents should put limitations on playing computer games and watching television for their children, engaging them to read more books. In this essay I agree with that notion and in my opinion, books are more beneficial for children than the electronic devices. On the one hand, computers and television are essential components of any modern individual regardless of the age. TV programmes may contain irreplacable contents of information as part of self education. For example, a program teaching a child Italian language can be incredibly valuable for a family that moved from the USA to Italy with a child who needs basic knowledge in Italian. As for computers, these pieces of technology are undoubtedly incredible tools to gain necessary information from Internet. However, both devices can have negative effects on child, such as affecting on shortsighedness or becoming an addiction for him. Meanwhile, books can lead to many positive changes in the child’s development. Firstly, reading develops imganation. Children subconciously transform the textual information into imaginary reality, creating their own world full of facts and personalities. As a matter of fact, language knolegde is also enriched through reading. Because books contain mainly literary texts, the grammatical skills and vocabulary are developed in a child’s brain. What is more, the positive literary heroes become role models for children, improving their moral and ethical values. To sum up, it can be reiterated that although computer games and television can be useful tools for children, du to their negative effects on child’s development in case of overusage, they should be limited and replaced by reading.
It is
commonly
said that parents should put limitations on playing computer games and watching television for their
children
, engaging them to read more
books
. In this essay I
agree
with that notion and in my opinion,
books
are more beneficial for
children
than the electronic devices.

On the one hand, computers and television are essential components of any modern individual regardless of the age. TV
programmes
may contain
irreplacable
contents of information as part of self education.
For example
, a program teaching a
child
Italian language can be
incredibly
valuable for a family that
moved
from the USA to Italy with a
child
who needs basic knowledge in Italian. As for computers, these pieces of technology are
undoubtedly
incredible tools to gain necessary information from Internet.
However
, both devices can have
negative
effects on
child
, such as affecting on
shortsighedness
or becoming an addiction for him.

Meanwhile,
books
can lead to
many
positive
changes
in the
child’s
development.
Firstly
, reading develops
imganation
.
Children
subconciously
transform the textual information into imaginary reality, creating their
own
world full of facts and personalities. As a matter of fact, language
knolegde
is
also
enriched through reading.
Because
books
contain
mainly
literary texts, the grammatical
skills
and vocabulary
are developed
in a
child’s
brain.
What is more
, the
positive
literary heroes become role models for
children
, improving their moral and ethical values.

To sum up, it can
be reiterated
that although computer games and television can be useful tools for
children
,
du
to their
negative
effects on
child’s
development in case of
overusage
, they should
be limited
and replaced by reading.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS academic Some people say that parents should places restrictions on the hours their children spend watching TV and playing computer games, and encourage them to spend this time reading books instead. v. 6

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
267 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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