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Pie charts shows water used in 6 different areas of world for different purposes. Summarise and highlight main points. v.2

Pie charts shows water used in 6 different areas of world for different purposes. Summarise and highlight main points. v. 2
The pie chart given below illustrates the proportion of water used for different purposes in six different parts of the world. Overall water is mainly used for Agricultural used followed by industrial purposes and lastly household purposes. Agriculture was by far the leading use of water in African and the Asian subcontinent, However in the American and European subcontinent the major use of water was for industrial purposes. The only exception to this was the area of South America where still farming is the main occupation, due to which agricultural use of water is the primary use. More than 70% of water in the South America was used for Agriculture, which was still less compared to the African and Asian subcontinent where Agriculture use around 80% of the use. Highest being central Asia and the lowest being Europe. Besides agriculture, Industrial use of water was the topic of importance. In Industrialized countries like Europe and North America industrial use of water exceeds agricultural use, as farming is decreasing in these areas due to emergence of industrialization. About 53% of water in Europe was used by industries, followed by North America with 48% and South America with 19%. Remaining parts of Asia and Africa used less than 10% on Industries, exception being south east asia where 12% of water was used for factory purposes. Domestic and Household use of water forms the third largest use of water. The least water used on domestic purposes was in asian subcontinent with 7%, followed by Africa with 9% due to lack of water sources. However, scenes were quite the opposite on the other side of the world where around 15% of water was used on household process. The highest domestic water usage was in South America where around 19% of people used water for regular domestic purposes.
The pie chart
given
below illustrates the proportion of
water
used
for
different
purposes
in six
different
parts of the world.

Overall
water
is
mainly
used
for Agricultural
used
followed by
industrial
purposes
and
lastly
household purposes.

Agriculture was by far the leading
use
of
water
in African and the Asian subcontinent,
However
in the American and European subcontinent the major
use
of
water
was for
industrial
purposes
. The
only
exception to this was the area of South America where
still
farming is the main occupation, due to which agricultural
use
of
water
is the primary
use
. More than 70% of
water
in the South America was
used
for Agriculture, which was
still
less compared to the African and Asian subcontinent where Agriculture
use
around 80% of the
use
.
Highest
being
central Asia
and the lowest being Europe.

Besides
agriculture,
Industrial
use
of
water
was the topic of importance.

In Industrialized countries like Europe and North America
industrial
use
of
water
exceeds agricultural
use
, as farming is decreasing in these areas due to emergence of industrialization. About 53% of
water
in Europe was
used
by industries, followed by North America with 48% and South America with 19%. Remaining parts of Asia and Africa
used
less than 10% on Industries, exception being
south east
asia
where 12% of
water
was
used
for factory purposes.

Domestic and Household
use
of
water
forms the third largest
use
of
water
. The least
water
used
on domestic
purposes
was in
asian
subcontinent with 7%, followed by Africa with 9% due to lack of
water
sources.
However
, scenes were quite the opposite on the other side of the world where around 15% of
water
was
used
on household process. The highest domestic
water
usage was in South America where around 19% of
people
used
water
for regular domestic
purposes
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS academic Pie charts shows water used in 6 different areas of world for different purposes. Summarise and highlight main points. v. 2

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
303 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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