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Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level.

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level.

essayopinionEducationArts
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Some people believe that arts education is as significant as the study of other subjects, especially for primary students. I completely agree with this viewpoint because some educational content could be better illustrated in the forms of arts, and the study of arts is one key consideration which fosters all-rounded growth of young students. The arts could deliver information to students, especially to those attending primary schools, in a way that words in textbooks sometimes cannot. Children may become bored and tired if they have to read or listen to too much educational content in textbooks. A colorful painting or a catchy song, on the other hand, can be much more appealing and thus more effective in conveying information to these children. For example, the Ghen Covy song has been taught at most schools in Vietnam and has become one of children’s favorite songs. This song has effectively highlighted the importance of hand washing as a means of disease prevention, and has made it easier for many children to remember every step of hand sanitization for its catchy melody and appealing dancing moves. Furthermore, the study of arts is one factor that contributes to a comprehensive development of young students. While academic subjects focus on children’s cognitive development, arts education help children to develop their social-emotional skills. By singing a song or drawing a picture, these children are likely to express their feelings and nurture their sense of community. For example, thousands of Vietnamese children, who were encouraged by their teaching staff, drew pictures of sunflowers to deliver messages of love and support for pediatric cancer patients. In conclusion, the arts can sometimes be better at transmitting knowledge than textbooks, and the provision of both academic and arts education is necessary for an all-rounded growth of young students. I firmly believe that the study of arts should never be underestimated in any child educational institution.
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Overall Band Score: 7.5
Task Achievement
8
The essay effectively addresses the task, presenting a clear opinion supported by relevant examples. However, a more explicit counterargument could strengthen the position.
Lexical Resource
7
The vocabulary used is appropriate and varied, but there are instances of repetition and some less precise word choices.
Coherence & Cohesion
7.5
The essay presents a clear argument with logical progression. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother.
Grammatical Range
7
The essay demonstrates a good command of grammar with a mix of simple and complex sentences, but there are minor errors that affect clarity.

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