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Your parents have both retired and they are now living in a city far away from where you work. You decided to find a job in that city so that you can look after them. Write to a company to apply for a job that is suitable for you. You should write at least 150 words.

Your parents have both retired and they are now living in a city far away from where you work. You decided to find a job in that city so that you can look after them. Write to a company to apply for a job that is suitable for you. 115AX
Dear Sir or Madam, I would like to apply for the position of salesman advertised on your company website. Your esteemed company is looking for an experienced, qualified and conscientious contributor that I should be a suitable one. My name is Bill Gate. I am a graduate of Ho Chi Minh City Marketing University and currently work as a salesman at Facebook. I have been working in the marketing field for five years. My advantage is to know many clients and my connection built with them would help your company a lot. The only reason for me to leave my current job is that my parents have both retired and they are now living in the city far from where I am working now. Therefore, I decided to apply to your firm so that I can look after them. I would certainly be interested in hearing from you and wish to have an appointment for an interview. For your convince, I have enclosed my resume. Looking forward to receiving your reply. Regards,
Dear Sir or Madam,

I would like to apply for the position of salesman advertised on your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
website. Your esteemed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
is looking for an experienced, qualified and conscientious contributor that I should be a suitable one.

My name is Bill Gate. I am a graduate of Ho Chi Minh City Marketing University and
currently
work as a salesman at Facebook.

I have been working in the marketing field for five years. My advantage is to know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
clients and my connection built with them would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
a lot.

The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
reason for me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
job is that my parents have both
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
retired and
they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
living in the city far from where I am working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
Therefore
, I decided to apply to your firm
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that I can look after them.

I would
certainly
be interested
in hearing from you and wish to have an appointment for an interview. For your convince, I have enclosed my resume.

Looking forward to receiving your reply.

Regards,
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IELTS letter Your parents have both retired and they are now living in a city far away from where you work. You decided to find a job in that city so that you can look after them. Write to a company to apply for a job that is suitable for you.

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
172 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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