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You would like your child to have a day off from school for a special family celebration.

You would like your child to have a day off from school for a special family celebration. ok1Y9
Dear Professor Jones, I am writing to ask if it would be possible for my daughter to be absent from school on the first Monday of next month. I completely understand that the school has a strict policy regarding absences; however, I hope that, given the circumstances, on this occasion permission could be granted. The reason for this special request is that her brother is getting married the day before and the wedding is taking place quite a distance away from our hometown. This means that we will be travelling back home on the Monday and will not arrive until late in the evening. Obviously, her brother would be devastated and heart-broken if she were unable to attend this special family occasion. As she will be missing a whole day of school, I envisage that there will be classwork to catch up on and this will be done as soon as she returns to school. As you know, my daughter is an incredibly conscientious and diligent student and will be keen to be up-to-date with her studies as soon as possible. I can assure you that missing these classes will not have a detrimental effect on Sarah’s academic progress. Please contact me if you would like to discuss this further. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours sincerely, John Smith
Dear Professor Jones,

I am writing to ask if it would be possible for my daughter to be absent from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
on the
first
Monday of
next
month. I completely understand that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
has a strict policy regarding absences;
however
, I hope that,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the circumstances, on this occasion permission could
be granted
.

The reason for this special request is that her brother is getting married the day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
and the wedding is taking place quite a distance away from our hometown. This means that we will be travelling back home on the Monday and will not arrive until late in the evening.
Obviously
, her brother would
be devastated
and heart-broken if she were unable to attend this special family occasion.

As she will be missing a whole day of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, I envisage that there will be classwork to catch up on and this will
be done
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as she returns to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. As you know, my daughter is an
incredibly
conscientious and diligent student and will be keen to be up-to-date with her studies as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible. I can assure you that missing these classes will not have a detrimental effect on Sarah’s academic progress.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
contact me if you would like to discuss this
further
. I look forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
sincerely
,

John Smith
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IELTS letter You would like your child to have a day off from school for a special family celebration.

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
221 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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