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letter to admission commitee

letter to admission commitee al6L7
Hello! My name is Julia Karachun and I live in Belarus, Minsk. I’ll be very grateful if you answer some of my questions! I’ve been dreaming of studying at UBC since I was 16 (now I’m 19). And finally, I’m in the process of filling my application form with the necessary information. Furthermore, I apply for the UBC International Scholars Program. There are some of the questions: 1. Can I duplicate some answers that are quite similar in both application forms (for example about extracurricular activities, volunteering, etc. ), or do they need to be rephrased somehow? 2. Are there any tips on how to become a viable candidate for admission (including International Scholars Program)? 3. Is it possible to see the statistics of applicants, who managed to receive this scholarship?
Hello!

My name is Julia
Possible spelling mistake found.
Karachun
and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in Belarus, Minsk.

I’ll be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
grateful if you answer
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of my questions!

I’ve been dreaming of studying at UBC since I was 16 (
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
I’m 19). And
finally
, I’m in the process of filling my application form with the necessary information.
Furthermore
, I apply for the UBC International Scholars Program.

There are
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
questions:

1. Can I duplicate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
answers that are quite similar in both application forms (
for example
about extracurricular activities, volunteering, etc.
Don't put a space before the closing parenthesis
)
, or do they need to
be rephrased
somehow?

2. Are there any tips on how to become a viable candidate for admission (including International Scholars Program)?

3. Is it possible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the statistics of applicants, who managed to receive this scholarship?
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IELTS letter letter to admission commitee

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
131 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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