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You work for a company. You have seen some information online about a training course that would be useful for your work. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • give details of the course • say how the course would be useful • explain how the company could help you do this course.

You work for a company. You have seen some information online about a training course that would be useful for your work. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • give details of the course • say how the course would be useful • explain how the company could help you do this course. KPA1
Dear Alex, I have recently become aware of a course that can be really fruitful for our company while I was surfing on the internet. The course name is Business Development Strategies. This is just 8 hours workshop by ABC going to be held on 25th March. They will teach how we can raise our business using entrepreneurship skills and effective marketing strategies with less investment. I have gone through the details of this course, it is impressive. Being at a Marketing Administrative position, I personally feel that after attending this course I can guide all other employees and we can raise our company by using new business techniques. Also, we would be aware of business trends in the market after joining this workshop. I am pretty sure this workshop is going to introduce the organizational facts that we are not already aware of. Moreover, they will provide the certification that would be a diamond for our success. Though this is a paid workshop, it is worth it. The registration fee is just $30. The seats are limited. I must register myself for this within five days. I hope you would allow me to attend this workshop. Could you please give me permission to pay for this and to go on a paid leave to attend this course? Looking forward to hearing from you soon. Yours Sincerely, XYZ
Dear Alex,

I have recently become aware of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
that can be
really
fruitful for our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
while I was surfing on the internet. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
name is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Business
Development Strategies. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
8 hours
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workshop
by ABC going to
be held
on 25th March. They will teach how we can raise our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
using entrepreneurship
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and effective marketing strategies with less investment.

I have gone through the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
, it is impressive. Being at a Marketing Administrative position, I
personally
feel that after attending this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
I can guide all other
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
employees and
we can raise our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
by using new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
techniques.
Also
, we would be aware of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
trends in the market after joining this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workshop
. I am pretty sure this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workshop
is going to introduce the organizational facts that we are not already aware of.
Moreover
, they will provide the certification that would be a diamond for our success.

Though this is a paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workshop
, it is worth it. The registration fee is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
$30. The seats
are limited
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
register myself for this within five days. I hope you would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to attend this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workshop
. Could you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
give me permission to pay for this and to go on a paid
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
to attend this course?

Looking forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
Sincerely
,

XYZ
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IELTS letter You work for a company. You have seen some information online about a training course that would be useful for your work. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • give details of the course • say how the course would be useful • explain how the company could help you do this course.

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
227 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • You work for a company. You have seen some information online about a training course that would be useful for your work. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • give details of the course • say how the course would be useful • explain how the company could help you do this course.