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You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he or she should get a job. Write a letter to your friend, in your letter, a) Why he / she would not enjoy going college. b) Explain why getting a job is a good idea for him /her c) Suggest a time job that would be suitable for him/her

Dear Jack, I hope this letter will find you in best of health and spirit. I received you letter last week stating that your MBA course work has finished at college and now you have to submit some final assignments before the exam. I would like to advise you that you should now stop going college because it would only the wastage of time. Rather you should start some job that will help you to promote you further in your career. You mentioned that classes are limited, because most of the course work has completed and attendance is quite low. Therefore, I would suggest that you should also not go to college now because it would waste your time. Although college has been good palace to meet and greet the friends and enjoy a quality time with them but now its time to start a career. A job immediately after college, without any break, will help you to enjoy a better career growth, because everything you studied is fresh in your mind. Moreover, starting a job will help you to learn more skills and improve your personality. As a career beginner, you should try to find some job with basic responsibilities like joiner book keeper or account technician. These early career jobs are very important because it will help you understanding whole accounting cycle from its very beginning. Hope this will help you to decide better. Best Regards, Sajjad
Dear Jack,

I hope this letter will find you in best of health and spirit. I received you letter last week stating that your MBA course work has finished at
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
college and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
submit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
final assignments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the exam.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
would like to advise you that you should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
going college
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the wastage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
Rather
you should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
that will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you to promote you
further
in your career.

You mentioned that classes
are limited
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
most of the course work has completed and attendance is quite low.
Therefore
, I would suggest that you should
also
not go to college
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it would waste your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Although college has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
palace to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and greet the friends and enjoy a quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
now
Did you mean “it’s” (short for ‘it is’) instead of ‘its’ (possessive pronoun)?
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a career.

A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
immediately after college, without any break, will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you to enjoy a better career growth,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
everything you studied is fresh in your mind.
Moreover
, starting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you to learn more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
your personality.

As a career beginner, you should try to find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
with basic responsibilities like joiner
This noun is normally spelled as one word.
book keeper
or account technician. These early career
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you
The verb ‘because’ is used with an infinitive: “to understand” or “understand”.
understanding
whole accounting cycle from its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beginning.

Hope this will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
you to decide better.

Best Regards,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Sajjad

IELTS letter You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he or she should get a job. Write a letter to your friend, in your letter, a) Why he / she would not enjoy going college. b) Explain why getting a job is a good idea for him /her c) Suggest a time job that would be suitable for him/her

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
238 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he or she should get a job. Write a letter to your friend, in your letter, a) Why he / she would not enjoy going college. b) Explain why getting a job is a good idea for him /her c) Suggest a time job that would be suitable for him/her