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You recently bought a digital camera. You discovered that it was damaged and some components were missing.

You recently bought a digital camera. You discovered that it was damaged and some components were missing. pX9ld
Dear Sir or Madam. I am writing to complain about the digital camera which I bought from your shop. After only two days, things started to go wrong. On the 29th of July I visited one of your local shops in order to buy a digital camera for my brother. Looking around the shop I encountered expected item and I asked a shop assistant about it. After getting all information I decided to purchase it. Two days later, my brother made a call and said about the problems of the item. When he used the camera for the first time it worked properly and photographs came out light and clear. However, when he utilized it the second time there seemed to have been a malfunction while it was working. The format of pictures went down when he take photos. I am looking forward to your reply and resolution of this matter. I will wait two weeks before turning to Customer Service Association responsible for this problem. Please contact me at the above address or call me on my mobile number at 3456576. Yours faithfully, Tom Hardy.
Dear Sir or Madam. I am writing to complain about the digital camera which I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
from your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
. After
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
two days, things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to go
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. On the 29th of July I visited one of your local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shops
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a digital camera for my brother. Looking around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
I encountered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
item and I asked a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shop
assistant about it.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
getting all information I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
it. Two days later, my brother made a call and said about the problems of the item. When he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
the camera for the
first
time it worked
properly
and photographs came out light and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
.
However
, when he utilized it the second time there seemed to have been a malfunction while it was working. The format of pictures went down when he
The pronoun 'he' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "takes", "took".
take
photos. I am looking forward to your reply and resolution of this matter. I will wait two weeks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
turning to Customer Service Association responsible for this problem.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
contact me at the above address or call me on my mobile number at 3456576. Yours
faithfully
, Tom Hardy.
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IELTS letter You recently bought a digital camera. You discovered that it was damaged and some components were missing.

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
186 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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