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There is a problem with the toy car which you purchased from the precious toy shop. Write a letter to the manager to resolve that issue.

There is a problem with the toy car which you purchased from the precious toy shop. Write a letter to the manager to resolve that issue. gxm53
I am writing to complain about a toy car with remoting control. I purchased from your shop last week. Although the toy car was in a high price, it did not have a remote control in its box. When my three years old son saw, he was extremely happy before knowing the matter. Moreover, the money for the toy was given by my son's granny in order to buy for her grandson to make him happy. After beholding the situation, he was too upset, got nervous that it is tough to control that device without a remote control. I sent the toy car back to your shop after having been assured by one of the assistants that I would be sent a refund. However, I still not received one. As a regular customer of yours, I feel disappointed with the way I have been treated and hope that steps will be taken to rectify. I trust the matter will receive your immediate attention. Yours sincerelyAgatha
I am writing to complain about a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
toy
car with
Possible spelling mistake found.
remoting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
from your shop last week. Although the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
toy
car was in a high price, it did not have a remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
in its box. When my three years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
son
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
, he was
extremely
happy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
knowing the matter.
Moreover
, the money for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
toy
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by my son's granny in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
for her grandson to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
him happy. After beholding the situation, he was too upset,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
nervous that it is tough to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
that device without a remote
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
control
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
toy
car back to your shop after having
been assured
by one of the assistants that I would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
a refund.
However
, I
still
not received one. As a regular customer of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
yours
, I feel disappointed with the way I have
been treated
and hope that steps will
be taken
to rectify. I trust the matter will receive your immediate attention.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Yours
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
sincerelyAgatha
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IELTS letter There is a problem with the toy car which you purchased from the precious toy shop. Write a letter to the manager to resolve that issue.

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
164 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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