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You have just started a course in a college with no sport facilites of its own . Write a letter to the manager of the nearest private sports club.

You have just started a course in a college with no sport facilites of its own. Write a letter to the manager of the nearest private sports club. obNAK
Dear Sir, I am writing to inquire about membership in the Youth Sports Club which is at a distance of 1 km from Khalsa college, Grant Trunk Road, Amritsar. I am a first year student and apparently pursuing a course of Computer science in Khalsa college. I have just discovered that my college does not have any sport facility of its own at the recent time. I am fond of playing Football and Basketball since the schooltime. Nowadays, I am looking for proffessional sport club to continue my passion for sports. I would be participating in inter-college competition this year in the football game. In order to be fit myself for the selection in a college team, i would require to have rigorous training for the next 3 months. Since, Youth sports club is the nearest to my residence, i would request some information about it. First, i would like to know about the training schedules, hours and fees. Additionaly, i would like to request details for membership packages and student discount. I look forward to hear from your side. Yours Sincerely, Pawanpreet.
Dear Sir, I am writing to inquire about membership in the Youth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sports
Club which is at a distance of 1 km from
Possible spelling mistake found.
Khalsa
college, Grant Trunk Road, Amritsar. I am a
first
year student and
apparently
pursuing a course of Computer science in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Khalsa
college. I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
discovered that my college does not have any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
facility of its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
at the recent time.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
am fond of playing Football and Basketball since the
Possible spelling mistake found.
schooltime
. Nowadays, I am looking for
Possible spelling mistake found.
proffessional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
club to continue my passion for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
. I would be participating in inter-college competition this year in the football game. In order to
be fit
myself for the selection in a college team,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would require to have rigorous training for the
next
3 months. Since, Youth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
club is the nearest to my residence,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would request
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
information about it.
First
,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to know about the training schedules, hours and fees.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Additionaly
,
Did you mean "I"?
i
would like to request
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
for membership packages and student discount. I look forward
In the grammatical structure 'look + forward + to + verb', the verb 'to' is used with the gerund: "to hearing".
to hear
from your side. Yours
Sincerely
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Pawanpreet
.
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IELTS letter You have just started a course in a college with no sport facilites of its own. Write a letter to the manager of the nearest private sports club.

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
183 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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